There were the days of winter when I had given my final examination and my mamu, maternal uncle, was living with a family who was almost as good as our own. One day, their grandfather passed away and so we all went to visit them.

When I was there, I was searching for a phone charger and entered a room. I saw a girl, who was probably the most beautiful one I had ever seen, speaking in Urdu in a voice that gave me shivers. She asked me who I was and I told her that I was mama’s relative. She smiled and welcomed me into their house. She told me her name was Mudasira. She was from a higher caste in the Muslim community. But despite all of this, I fell in love with her instantly. After a few days, she began talking to me for hours and this became the first steps of our relationship.

One day, I proposed to her. She humbly told me that it wasn’t something possible. I told her that I’ve been dreaming about her and she simply couldn’t say no.

I kept asking her to be with me, but she always said she’d think about it but nothing more than that. One evening, I was talking about my mamu with her mother. Without reason or notice, she slapped me. I was shocked and couldn’t stop crying. I ran out of there; she was right behind me.

She fell to my feet and begged me to forgive her. I couldn’t manage a word at the time and tried my best to forget her and the incident. I couldn’t understand why she had done such a thing. During this time, I completed my MSC in Physics from Kashmir University in 2011 and I was now preparing myself to get a good and steady job.

One day, I called her mom and asked her to give me Mudasira’s phone number. Thankfully, she never really asked for a reason and gave it to me immediately.

We began talking on Whatsapp and she cried for hours and asked me why I left without talking to her again. I told her I was busy and couldn’t get time to speak to her. Immediately, she knew I was lying. And a few days later, she told me that if her dad agreed with us, then she would marry me, readily.

In 2014, we began dating. Things went well, for about a year. In 2015, she spoke to her family about us. They denied everything; our love, our future, everything. She told me to wait; she said that she would figure things out at her house and get back to me, as soon as she possibly could.

Soon, we both had to take admission in our respective colleges, sadly, we both couldn’t get into the same college. One evening, she began telling me about this guy, Ajaaz. She told me that he’s helping her, with work and other studies. I thought that it was good, that someone was being so nice to her and helpful.

But as time passed, she began talking about him, often. Almost a little too much. Of course, we did have our fair share of arguments about him. But she told me that I was being petty. Suddenly, out of the blue, her father died and that’s when things took a turn for the worse.

I didn’t know whom I should speak to, about our future. And all of this thinking, I was late.

I found out that she had opened up about her relationship with Ajaaz. I couldn’t stop crying. Till now, she’s not told me anything about her relationship with this guy or why she decided to marry him, and not even give me a chance. We’ve been fighting for years now, unfortunately, she’s found a way to move on and someone to move on with while I’m here, depressed and have to worry about my future.

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