It Took Me 5 Painful Years To Realize That She Was Not The Right Person For Me

Anonymous Anonymous in Life Is Tough on 12 September, 2017

I am a 20 year old boy and I am in my final year of engineering. I come from a middle/lower middle class Indian family. I fell in love with a girl when I was in school.

I loved her so much that I put her above my goals.

I proposed to her in 2012 and she said, “Yes!” Things were fine between us. After I finished school, I got admission in a reputed engineering college. She was my junior so she continued studying in her school for the next two years. I was passionate about engineering so I started doing well. Luckily I got all the support that I needed from my college.

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I started getting amazing opportunities to prove myself on different national and international platforms from my college. I got a chance to visit 4 countries. I also represented my country and was very proud about it. But I never let my professional life come between us.

But she never understood what I was doing. She would always complain a lot every time I went out for work.  

But I loved her. So I did whatever it took me to keep her happy. But she took me for granted.

Things started getting worse. Our calls turned into fights every time.

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She started blocking me for months. I would keep calling her 100 times in a day.

I bought new SIM cards. I would call her from my friend’s phone and ask her to unblock me. But she kept doing it. I now got another chance to go out and represent my country. She called me and we started fighting again. I requested her not do that.

I told her that I have to take the responsibility for my college and for my country and I couldn’t handle this now. She blocked me again.

A few days later I went for the event. I called her as soon as I landed in India. She texted me saying that, “We are done!” I was heartbroken because I couldn’t do anything about it. She had blocked me from everywhere again.

I was so depressed that I couldn’t study or continue working on my projects. My CGPA went down from 9.8 to 4 that semester. I was fired from the team as I could not focus on my work.
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I just sat in my room and cried. I kept calling her. She would call sometimes and I would beg her to get back with me. I avoided my parents and stayed away from home because I didn’t want them to get affected by my problems. They lived in our village and I knew they would never be able to accept the fact that their son was going through some mental disorder.

Things continued in this manner for quite a while. I could not afford to go to a mentor or a therapist because I didn’t have money. It took me three months to recover from this but I fought my way out of it on my own. I have started leading a normal life now.

I was determined to be strong about it and decided that I would never cry or harm myself for her. I knew she didn’t deserve me.

I realized that I had wasted five important years of my life for a wrong person. I then met an amazing girl online. We started talking. She was the only person with whom I shared things. I told her what had happened. She supported me like anything. She helped me get out of my depression. She is as ambitious as I used to be. She helped me get back on my track to success.

Author's Note:

I finally got a reason to live my life. I now have a start up on green energy. I have not entered into any kind of relationship with her as I am scared of relationships now. But I promised her that one day, after both of us achieved our goals, we would both create our future together.

Editor's Note:

Love has the uncanny ability of bringing us down on our knees. It can distort every aspect of our life. But it also gives us the strength to plod on. Share this young man’s success story because it reflects his grit and determination to overcome all odds.