In March 2020, a few days before the lockdown happened, my doctor had found a large cyst in my ovary. I was under medication, and we managed to dissolve the cyst. I came back to Goa because it was expensive to live in Bombay. I dreaded this return because of my past failures for not having achieved anything consequential. I wasn’t in the best mental or physical health. It took me one month to settle in with my parents again. I moved out of their house at sixteen, and it was only natural to have some conflicts of opinions here and there.
All this created a lot of pressure on my mental health. I decided this time to stop playing the victim card. I no longer wanted to complain. I started by getting my workout routine in place, slowly but surely. It helped me ease my mind, and then I started working on the problems I was facing with my parents. I had no hope of a job, but I didn’t let myself slip into a lack mindset.
Soon, my friend and I decided to start a support group with a counsellor present.
We had built a retreat program with a counsellor, and we put some small ideas together and gave birth to our first passion project- ‘Circle of Solitude’.
From unemployed to entrepreneur- I experienced a journey of a lifetime. In the November of 2020, another business opportunity came my way, and I again founded a business venture - cash&cosmos. We held events in Goa for the same.
It’s been a year since then. Every day and every minute I’ve lived and breathed my work. I’ve worked through burnouts and heartbreaks. It’s like I didn’t take any time for myself. I even faced a lot of obstacles because of covid. When the second wave hit, it broke the momentum of my work, and it came as a shock to me. I had put in a lot of hard work and money, only to lose most of it to the pandemic (second wave). On some days, I still feel disillusioned and demotivated.
One thing I feel I’ve done right during this pandemic is, working on my health, both physical and mental. I put myself out there, not just physically but also emotionally and virtually. I wasn’t distracting myself anymore. I took time to sit and grieve my expectations, losses, and suppressed emotions. I also worked on those so that I don't have to carry them with me anymore. I have taken counselling with my mom, and it has been a great experience. I also believe in the power of manifestation and that is what helps me heal faster.
I now know that I can't change how things unfold in my life, but I do know that I can change how I feel about those things in my life.