We Fell In Love Thinking Caste Will Also Not Be An Issue: Now I Feel Stupid

Anonymous Anonymous in Life Is Tough on 8 March, 2017

I'm anonymous, 26 year old, in Delhi and a working guy. I met up with a sweet girl two and a half years ago. We both belong to the same state but different parts. We have a very beautiful love story.

We both have been mad for each other since the first time we met, which we didn't admit for a couple of months. We used to chat and talk for hours. I used to skip my sleep to talk to her, because of the time difference of 5.30 hours between two countries. I used to wake up at 2:30 am to talk to her or chat if we couldn't talk. This was before I have even proposed her, which I did on 1st feb on her birthday. 

A month later, she realised I live too far and she was wasting her time. She stopped talking to me.

I was not happy at all with her decision. I prayed to God to help me out. I was so mad about her that I started fasting to reach out to lord shiva. While I was busy praying to God for her, she moved to another city for coaching and we started talking again for hours.

This time I decided I won't ask her out because I didn't want to lose her. I was happy to just be her friend.

We used to talk for 4-5 hours a day and sometimes we didn't even sleep. One night she proposed me and I was the happiest person in this world. I bunked work the next day because we were talking the whole night.

That's when our real love story started. We both were crazy about each other. I told her about my idea of not proposing her and after listening to this, she started crying. We were sure about our relationship because we belonged to the same caste so there were not going to be any family issues either.


At this point we used to talk everyday and the bond between us was so strong, we knew that we were made for each other. We don't fight, we respect each other, we call each other 'aap' like a married couple and care for each other.

We spent so much time together when I was in India, we used to drive to her city that was an 8 hour drive. And we both can't forget those days. We stayed together for days. We used to sleep together over the phone and Skype chat. We decided everything about what we're going to wear on our wedding day and what would be our child's name and how she's going to react when I come back home in the evening and where we're going to live after retirement. 

Now after all this, as all Indian parents do, they want her to marry another boy. And they think he is the right choice for her. So at this point, she told them about me. Her father said 'No' for me because he doesn't like my hometown. 

The reason behind this is that her dad is in the police and he had a bad experience in my area when he was posted there. She has three elder sisters and they are not even trying to understand or helping us in convincing her father.

She also can't say anything to her father because he had a stroke a couples of months ago. Her sisters are convincing her for the other guy because they also think that their father is right and my girlfriend is immature.

If she is not mature then why are they asking her to get married at the first place? I don't know what to do at this point. I'm scared because she is so vulnerable right now, she cries on the phone for her dad because he doesn't talk to anybody these days.

He thinks that I'm not good and he's not sure if I'm the right person for her. I don't know how to convince her father that I will take very good care of his daughter in the future.

I hope my girlfriend stays strong through this time because I don't want to lose her.

Moreover she doesn't want to marry anyone else so if her father wants her to do that it'll affect her physically and emotionally. He doesn't have his daughter's consent to let her go with a stranger to live with him for life. I hope he understands that.