Life is fair. For every bad thing that happens to you, there will be a good thing that will happen to you, is what I believed since I was a child. But now I know that life is not fair but you have to start loving it regardless instead of complaining about it before it's too late to live.
It's a lazy Saturday afternoon, I am in my hostel room with fairy lights on, fidgeting on my laptop trying to decide whether to watch something or play the ukelele. Just then, I saw an old writeup of mine and it took me down the memory lane.
I come from an upper-middle-class family and a defence background. My father was in the army so I along with my mother and brother used to live in our hometown. I did not have a very smooth childhood but I always used to believe that in the end, everything will be fine and that used to give me the courage to smile through every hurdle.
My life started changing after my 18th birthday. It was suddenly decided that I have to go to a reputed college in another city, leaving my home, family, friends, and boyfriend, everything behind. The first 6 months were super hard. But with time things start to get easier or rather we start to get acquainted with the new environment. It took me around 1.5years to adjust to this new home of mine. My brother also got into one of the top IIMs and my dad got posted to our hometown.
Finally, after 20 years of my life, I could say my life was complete. But, I guess I had spoken too soon as everything started falling apart real soon after.
My 4-year long relationship ended on a terrible note. I am a person who prioritizes friendship over a relationship, and I had to go through the pain of not only losing a boyfriend but also my best friend. His apologies and efforts could not cover up for his one big mistake. It took me 3 months and one unforgettable trip to Vizag with my friends to come to terms with his absence in my life.
Life became smooth again. Our semester exams got postponed due to some reason and we all went home to enjoy a longer winter vacation. Within a week, I had an event. It was 6th December'18, we were all tired after the final rehearsal for our dance performance and ramp walk for the event the next day.
I wish I'd known that I'd never to make it to the event. I practiced till 1 am and went to bed, my brother called and I wished him all the best for his exam, and I went to sleep. It was 1:30 am in the night, I was half asleep when I heard my father sobbing, I got up to go to his room trying to figure out what had happened.
I saw him sitting on the floor, crying for my mother. I called my mother and my dad told Ma that he had a brain stroke. I have always considered myself to be a strong, independent woman but at that moment, when I saw the strongest person of my life in such a helpless condition, I could feel myself going weak in the knees. I gathered myself, called my brother, the ambulance and all the nearby relatives.
Ma and some of our family members took dad to the hospital while I stayed in our house with my grandpa. It was 5 in the morning when my grandma and Ma returned home. None of us spoke a word. Next day we woke up, went to the hospital and waited till the doctor came and told Ma that, "His brain is dead but his heart is working fine, we are sorry."
I always used to think where I got all my strength from, but when I saw Ma in so much pain, I went to her and said, "All will be fine. Dada and I are there naa, we will take care of everything."
At that moment, I realized that I had picked up all my strength and courage from my father. It's been 9 months since this happened, we have moved to New Delhi. My brother is working in a reputed bank. I am in my final year of B.Tech, and currently doing a paid internship at one of the MNCs' and have three job offers in my hand. My mother is trying to handle all the legal and financial things. And, tomorrow is dad's birthday.
Whatever we are doing, wherever we are and what we have achieved, and all the efforts that we make every day to keep ourselves busy go in vain, when the night comes and we go to bed with a heavy heart and teary eyes that make us realize that our life will never feel complete again.