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I Met Him On A Dating App And Fell In Love But I'll Never Forget What He Said That Day
( words)
*For representational purpose only.
I was indeed very sceptical about falling in love. The heartbreak, the agony, was nothing new to me but I never wanted to risk anything again. I had two basic rules, number one being don't fall in love and number two being don't break number one.
And then one day this charming man walks into my life and then rules are meant to be broken. A simple right swipe on a notorious dating app and I found love in a hopeless place. Then what followed was a story of unconditional love. The only problem being the distance.
This young man is a brave officer of our elite armed forces. Waking up to see your beloved's face on FaceTime every day was indeed excruciating but the never ending love that contained our hearts gave us the courage to wait eagerly for the day we would wake up in each other's arms. But every love story has its fair share of misunderstandings and fights and ours had more than its share.
The distance and the fights, misunderstandings and frustrations. Well they don't hurt as much as words do and in a relationship you need to keep a check on what you speak, for your words can leave a scar.
One such scar still haunts my beautiful story. One such fight where misunderstandings clouded my mind and frustration overpowered me led to verbal exchanges, full of things that could indeed shatter one's heart.
The thing that shattered my heart the most was when he said, "I have given up on you."
Though our relationship is still going strong, it made me question one very important thing, that is, the essence of my emotions. It made me question my love for him. Where did I lack? What did I do wrong? Did I fail in loving him? For these were mere words for him spoken in anger or irritation or frustration because of too many fights and arguments but they proved me to be a failure. I wasn't worthy of the fight anymore.
No matter how many times you say you love me there's a part of me that will always know I am easy to be given up on. There's a part of me that knows the unconditional love I have for you is not worthy of the fights.
