Love Relationships heartbreak loneliness indian man

No Matter How Long It Takes And How Lonely I Feel Without Her, I Will Still Wait

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

I won’t say that I was really happy in Bangalore but was not sad definitely. A job with a consulting firm, independent life, living alone, doing whatever I wished to – cooking (I have always loved it), then came the hogging, late night airport rides with my sports beauty, and more hogging.

I was kind of scattered, lonely at times, but then, was never upset or never had this empty feeling where I would feel a vacuum within.

But as they say, there comes a moment when you have your date with your destiny or something like that! It’s a kind of, a moment which you can’t run away from, no matter how hard you try. There came this new job in Pune. I was super excited. I will be honest, not excited because I was going to Pune, but because I would be joining a new job, new challenges, etc. The irony is, I never knew it would take me on such a roller coaster ride that it would change my life forever.

I shifted, though I was not much happy – was missing Bangalore and friends over there – Pune was kind of alien, as I didn’t know anyone here.

My mind was set, one year in this city and then, I will be back in Bangalore.

And then she appeared out of nowhere. We came in touch through one of those matrimony sites which I had to create because of my father’s happiness. All the women I ever came across from there till date, I had somehow managed to say “No” to them, because somehow I have always been stubborn enough to believe that I would never go marry someone using these sites.

I would find my lady, fall in love with her in a crazy manner and then get married.

But not this one lady, I guess. Now I feel I was destined to meet her. That’s why maybe I even came to Pune (believe me or not, I had given freaking all my efforts to stay back in Bangalore even after getting this new job – and my God, I guess that kind of inhuman efforts should have worked, but I had no clue why I didn’t get anything there and I had to move). The first time I ever saw her, I still remember the date and time – 3rd March, 5 PM – she was one of the calmest and most composed ladies I have ever seen, not one of the most, actually, the most. Even before meeting her I was thinking I would go back home and just drop a text saying – “Nah, it is not going to work out, we are too different.”

And here I am, writing this after so many months, crazily in love with her.

We had planned for the evening. She had conveyed that she had an injury on her leg and I had agreed to go meet her, pick her up from her home and go to some coffee shop. I thought I could do that much as a friend, as we had been talking to each other for quite some time and she had become like a friend. But it was that moment when I saw her; I had lost something inside my mind. I just kept looking at that face – calm, composed, wearing specs and looking super cute.

The kind of aura she exuded, there was a kind of tranquillity visible on her face, which just made me fall head over heels.

We actually ended up spending the whole evening together. From the coffee shop to a Chinese restaurant to my cousin’s place, to what not! Around 9 or so, I dropped her back in her apartment, looked at her face one last time – subconsciously, the happiest and glad that I met her, and left for my place. Even while I was riding my bike, the only thought which was hovering over my mind – was the lady. I was highly confused, as I didn’t know what was really happening to me.

After that evening, weeks passed by. We got to know each other more. The more I got to know her, the more I fell in love with her. Though I knew it was never going to be an easy task, as her job requires her to travel, she goes and stays onsite for a long time before she comes back.

But hey, when did good things become easy?

One evening, a couple of weeks before she travelled, she told me that she loves me too. I was happy like that child who gets the best chocolate in the lot because finally, the lady whom I loved reverted. Tough times were about to come through, once she would travel. In these months, we have loved each other; we have fought with each other and everything else. But we never left each other alone. We have stood by each other no matter what.

I went along with her to see her off at the airport. It was not an easy task for me.

I wanted to say a lot but could not. I just kept staring at her face. She went inside the airport. I kept looking, just with a hope that I would get to see one glimpse of her face and then after some time when I could not see her again, I came back.

Today she is halfway across the world. We hardly get to talk to each other because of the time difference and obviously, our work timings are different as well. We have fought big times as well after she landed there. But still, we made it a point that we connect to each other, some way or other.

The day she was flying onsite, she had told me one thing – “Paglu, what are a few months in front of an entire lifetime ahead of us?”

Yes, I do miss her every moment. But I will wait. Because I know she would have done the same if she was in my place. This time I am sure I am not going to give up, even if it’s the end of the world. This time I am sure, no matter how long it takes, no matter how lonely I may feel without her here, I will wait. Because she would have done the same thing if she was in my place.

The thing is, we never lose “until” we give up. Now I guess, adversities come only to those who would not crumble under. It’s just a long difficult testing time which needs to be completed. Patience is the most important thing which we need here. It’s just God saying – “You love each other, right? Prove that you deserve each other.”

The first-morning kiss, that pretty smile which she had
She snuggled with him, hugging him from back
Kissing his neck, promising a lifetime of love
All he could do - hug her tight, with a forehead peck
They were in each other's arms, blissfully together
Time seemed to stop, while they stared at each other
The moment was short, she would go far away across the world
A journey starts which would seem to have no end so far
The night breeze, the chill - freezes his eyes!
Yet the same warm heart - it would forever beat for her
Quietly he would look at the stars, try drawing her pretty face in the sky
Eyes closed, he sees her face - smiling at him with the utmost care
The heart beats fast, as he tries to touch her arms
Alas, wasn't her, but the memories within forever
So very tired, he falls asleep closing his mind, all the doors
Waking up to it, she says - "no matter wherever I go, you my paglu & I would always be yours"
He would smile - for he would rather fall but never give up on her
That, even a billion miles wouldn't stop them from being together
True - it hurts to stay apart from the person whom he loves
But as she would say - "What is a few months in front of an entire lifetime"! After which we are with each other forever

- To Motu

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