My Grandfather Is Gone Now, But For One Last Time I Want To Tell Him This

P Shah P Shah in Life Is Tough on 11 March, 2018

Truly blessed to have YOU! “Hello, Where are you?” “I am just about to reach the railway station. What happened?” I replied. “He is in critical condition, it’s an emergency,” saying this my cousin hung up. Upon hearing this, my heart started pounding at a faster pace. It was 20th October 2011 at around 1:30 p.m. I was in a fast local and the Mumbai fast local just didn’t seem fast enough that day.

After I hung up, my eyes started to get moist, and the ladies around me started staring. Only I knew what was wrong with me. I kept telling myself that things will be fine soon, and I was praying to God to give him strength to overcome it.

I reached the station at 1:45 pm and the indicator which flashed ‘2:04 CST S 12’ grabbed my attention. I got distracted by the ring of my cell phone, “where are you? Did you get the news?” Questioned my cousin on the other line and said, “Reach home ASAP. He left us. He is no more.” My tears started flowing and I broke down on the station’s platform no 2. Fifteen minutes passed and I felt a hard punch in my tummy. I looked around and waited for someone to tell me that I was dreaming and that everything is fine. I somehow managed to reach home as fast as I could.


The minute I entered, all I saw was people sitting in a line and crying. I went through the drawing room area and entered the room where he was kept. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw that he was lying still on the bed. I went near him and touched him, he showed no signs of movement and the realization dawned on me: my grandfather is no more. I wanted to move him and tell him one last time, “I promise will never argue with you, please just open your eyes.” That very minute, I understood how selfish God can be because he just took him away from us, without thinking what are we going to do without him. Memories of the past 22 years started flashing in front of me. Grandpa and I would end up arguing a lot. Usually, for petty things but down the line, we knew that we care and love each other, and really can’t stay without talking.

I remember him asking me to manage his accounts when he found it difficult to manage. I really cannot forget the times he has scolded me for scoring average marks, the stationery which he bought for us every Saturday, the crisp new notes during Diwali, the shoe shopping for Diwali. We celebrated each and every festival with the grace of his presence. I still cherish the day he cried when I gave him my first salary. I was truly blessed to have such a grandpa.

Today that my grandpa is resting in peace, I am standing in his room and staring at his photo, hoping he might speak to me. I know that he is watching me.
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