Marriage Confession

I'm Married And A Working Mom Today But I Still Talk To Him

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

I have been married for 10 long years and have a baby boy, but I am still unable to overcome my past. I am a working mother.

During my college days, I met a boy and fell in love deeply with him. We loved each other deeply and wanted to marry each other. But due to caste differences, my parents didn’t agree to give him my hand. I tried my best but they didn’t agree.

Amidst all this, my father was diagnosed with cancer and I was left with no option but to marry someone of his choice.

I met my husband, found him to be sensible and understanding and so I gladly married him. My ex tried his best to stop the marriage but couldn’t do so. I was happy being married but still, somewhere I used to miss my ex-lover. He tried to get my contact details multiple times but he couldn’t get in touch with me.

Suddenly, one day, he got my number and called me and we started speaking again. I tried avoiding him but I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

We still speak sometimes after all these years and he didn’t marry anyone after me, he just couldn't fall in love again.

Even after 10 years of my marriage, I still have feelings for him and can’t forget him and sometimes feel like going back to him. But only for my son’s future and for my parents' sake, I don't have the courage to leave my married life behind. 

I guess, this is what 'first love' feels like. It never dies. 

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