We met the day when everything around seemed to be so much more beautiful. I saw you come inside, sat across me and smiled. That interview changed my life. You entered into my life. It was silly, not worth remembering the day for you, but for me, it was very special which I would never forget.
We met a few months later over drinks, only to have me drunk and confessing in that pub about how much I adore you. I don't remember much, but I do remember the tiny kisses you planted on my head when I was all dizzy and drunk. You brought me out safely and I was holding on to you. Your arms were around me and that was the most beautiful day of my life.
You dropped me home and we met for an office party later.
My fucked up fate landed me and you in another colleague’s house. You scolded me to hush as I was calling your name over and over again, and that colleague was eyeing you suspiciously. You didn’t touch me that night and I was just happy to have you around. Days passed by and we went on a trip, just you and me.
We kissed and I told you how messed up my life was.
You sat and listened to it all and put me to sleep. We returned back and you told me how happy you were to have me in your life. Maybe you meant it as a friend, but I misunderstood it. We met again and we kissed again at a friend's place. While all that was just a fun thing for you, it meant the world for me. Being a 27-year-old grown a**, I failed to realize how boys are, or at least I was to you.
I finally questioned you if you loved me and you said yes and everything just felt so beautiful.
I wanted to scream out loud, hold you in my arms and show the world that you were mine. But you immediately put a clause by saying that you can’t see a future with me because of our cast differences. Why did it not come when you placed your lips on mine? We met several more times with every time, you came to me with that clause.
There were times when we just passed out in each other's arms with friends giggling at us in the morning.
I know we never had sex so I can't call you the bad guy. But don't these small things matter? You biting my nose to wake me up and kissing me to make me feel complete. Don't they? Or maybe, they never did. It was just a thing for you. I know you are a nice person. The whole world says so, and you indeed are. But why couldn't I be the special one for you? I know you need me in your life; you even put efforts for me. But when I try to come to you, you back off. Why are physical feelings dominant over emotional? I know you will be married soon to another girl. I wish you a lifetime of happiness, my love.
I will miss you, more than anyone ever will.