To me, love was a fairy tale in which the couple would be happy all the time. I was more than 200% sure that I would never experience a break up! I had never been in a relationship before. Of course, I had a crush on some guys. But I always knew it was just a crush.

I joined my college after I finished my secondary school, at the age of 18. I had known this guy for many years. He was one of the most active youngsters in my church. Everyone knew him so well. All the parents who had young girls, would always ask their daughters to marry a guy like him. My mother did so too.

After I joined my college, we started meeting in the church every weekend as we attended the same church. After a few weeks, he asked me for my number and we became friends very quickly. For more than one year, we just talked normally like friends. I had a crush on him but I never showed it to him. Then one day he asked me if I had a boyfriend. I said, “No.” Then the way he talked to me and messaged me became very sweet. I would have butterflies in my stomach and would always smile whenever he messaged me.

On my 21^st birthday, he hosted a surprise birthday celebration for me. I was so so flattered. I was so sure that he liked me. He treated me like a princess. Every weekend I would be waiting just to meet him. His workplace was quite far from my place but he would try to come back every weekend.

Then one Thursday when he was texting me, he suddenly said, “There is a guy who is sincerely in love with you, but you are just ignoring him!” I was so speechless. Of course I understood what he meant by that statement. I just ignored it and did not talk about that topic. I talked about something else. Actually, I was so scared to be in love. I felt that this guy was way too good for me and I didn’t deserve such a guy.

Then again he texted me and talked about the same thing. He also told me that he needed to talk to me regarding this matter and he would do so the next day. I was too excited. Though I had seen him quite a few times in these three years, I felt so nervous to face him the next day.

He was too sweet with me. He kept looking at me and offered to drop me back to my college. We didn’t talk about the proposal on the way back. Somehow he knew that I was not yet ready for this. By this time, we had reached the hostel and he said, “Don’t worry. Take your time. I will wait for your answer.” It made me feel so special. That night, I asked him so many questions. He answered all of them patiently. The next day when he was about to leave for his workplace, he told me that he would miss me and he started crying. I too started crying and suddenly without realizing it, I said, “I love you!” That was the beginning of our love story.

We would go on dates and I loved hugging him. He was a very sensitive guy. He used to surprise me and I loved him a lot. Both our families were so happy with our relationship. Things were going on so well.

As time passed, we both became busy. We didn’t get to spend as much time together as we did in our earlier days. He would come back to his hometown once every two weeks. Initially, he would come and pick me up from my college, then we would go to the church and stay there together till night and then he would drop me off to the college. After a few months, he said he could not come to pick me up and drop me off and asked me to come by myself to the church. He would meet me in the church and that is all. He still talked to me and treated me nicely. I would fight if he didn’t come and meet me. Of course, I could not hold his hand or hug him when we were in church. But he said that nothing had changed between us.

As time passed, he started ignoring my calls and only texted me. Even if I called him, he would say that he was busy but would talk so sweetly in his texts. Exactly after one year, we had a fight. It was a normal fight that we usually had about not spending time together. He generally comforted me and talked to me if we had a fight. But this time, he didn’t even bother to talk to me. He just simply said, “When you are ok, you message me.” We didn’t talk that whole day. That was the first time.

Then the very next day, I texted him and told him, “Sorry!” and he just replied with an “OK!” He didn’t talk to me after that. I tried to call him. But he rejected my calls. He said he was busy. I tried to call him almost 50 times and he didn’t answer – not even once. When I texted him, he just replied with “OK!” I was so heartbroken. Even then, I thought things would be fine in one or two days.

On 14^th of February, I was waiting for him to wish me. Instead I got a long text from him exactly at 12 a.m.  The text said, “Our relationship is not working out. It is definitely my mistake. I don’t know how to keep you happy. Let us just pray to God!”

Actually I didn’t believe the text. I thought it was just a prank. I called him. He still didn’t answer. I started crying and asked him what had happened. He said the same thing again.

I was not able to sleep the whole night. I just burst into tears. I waited for the weekend so that I could meet him. But he acted so well. He pretended that I was invisible. He didn’t even look at my face. When I tried to talk to him, he just ignored me and walked away. I was too sad. I tried to talk to him for almost three months but he didn’t respond to any of my calls. He only replied to my text messages twice and that too very sarcastically. Then one day, one of our mutual friends told me that he liked a girl from his hometown.

That was an unforgettable night for me. I cried so loudly. I have never cried like that in my whole life. My parents and my sister were unable to comfort me. After a few hours of crying, I stopped. I decided that I would never cry for a guy who didn’t know my value. I am trying my best to not meet him. It’s already been seven months since we both talked to each other. I still cry on my own sometimes. I still love him a lot. But it is very hard for me to forgive him.

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