I am a homemaker, 27 and a mother of a 4-year-old boy. The days before and after my labour time and my son's birth changed me into a new person with the courage to defend myself whenever something is going wrong.
I was born and brought up in a very orthodox family, where all the decisions were done made by the 'man of the house', my dad. Everything, my graduation was yet to finish when my dad started finding suitable matches for my marriage and was very particular that I needed to go with the person he chose for me.
As I got done he was all ready with the guy I had to get married to, I was given no options except agreeing for the proposal. There came the hero of my life the, my husband. He was short, fair, smiling at me at the first glance and I was not so interested in marriage so I didn't even smile back. He made sure I was okay with the proposal so he said he needed to speak with me once. And we were allowed to talk to each other.
I didn't respond much, I just said "I always go with my dad's decision" and I walked away. Later all the elders discussed and fixed our engagement date. The next day we started talking to each other, he used to call on my mom's phone to talk to me. After a friendly chat with him, I felt good and as time passed I started loving him and felt he was the right guy for me and my dad's choice was actually the best.
As the marriage date was nearing I was very excited and eager to get into a new life full of happiness as shown in the movies as I was just 22. Our wedding day was the most memorable moment of my life, I still remember my mom crying till the end of the marriage as I was the elder daughter and I had not left home for more than a week. After spending 3 beautiful days in my home, it was time to leave
I had to go to a new home full of strangers. I had never been so tensed in my life. I was so nervous when I started for my husband's home, which was in same city and just 11 km away from my parents' home. As we entered my 'new home' I saw my mother-in-law with a mysterious smile on her face. She had planned so many things for me. As my parents spent some time and left for home, I was feeling like I had been left in some unknown place and could not control my tears rolling from my eyes. I asked my parents not to leave me.
My husband said to me, "I am there for you here, don't worry. Everything will be fine." He consoled me. As we both left my parents near an auto stand and returned home, I was handed over list of work I needed to do on a daily basis.
I started my first day in the new house with cleaning my room, which was so messy. My mother-in-law stated all the rules that I needed to follow in that house. I struggled a lot the whole of first year of my marriage.
Life was difficult, my mother-in-law used to scold me for silly reasons. She could not stand it if my hubby and I went out for dinner. I got pregnant after 6 months of my marriage, she was the only person who was not happy in the house. She started torturing me even more by putting all house hold chores on me. I needed to wash clothes with my hands even though a washing machine was there.
I could not sleep if I was tired, she did not give me permission to go to my mom's place. As all of this was going on, a very tragic event happened. I lost a loved one, who used to take care of me and was concerned about me and my unborn baby — my father-in-law, a very good person. I didn't get to spend much time with him as he worked in another city. We lost him when he came home for my baby shower in an accident.
My husband was totally broken. But this incident did not really have an effect on my mother-in-law. She was the same old woman treating me like a maid.
I still remember the date, it was 12.12.12 when I was admitted to the hospital because of hectic pain in my stomach and I was not able to feel my son's movements. Doctors said it was labour pain and it would be a pre-term delivery. They needed to delay it for at least 3 weeks. I saw hell break loose over there. I was given 14 injections to improve the growth of my baby's lungs and was suggested complete bed rest.
Doctors said that it was because of stress and not taking proper rest. The doctors could not delay the delivery for more than 15 days. My son was born on the 23rd, my happiness knew no bounds when I saw him in my arms. I was still upset about my father-in-law's death.
That day as I saw my son, I decided I will never compromise on myself again and my health. I will not live like a maid in my own house under a woman who has no humanity left inside of her. Now I am a changed person who makes her own decisions. I explained to my husband the trauma and he supported me. He stood with me and now he strictly defends me if his mother ever talks about me.