To The Girl Who Feels Sorry For Sleeping With My Husband: I Need To Tell You Something, It's Important

Anonymous Anonymous in Life Is Tough on 27 October, 2016

The meeting will be very casual, a coffee shop maybe. Your dress will be simple, but worthy enough to grab his eyeballs. You will smile at him, a smile that says ‘I know you are interested and I don’t mind that.’ His eyes full of lust and desire to try something new, will keep staring with hope. Being the noble person that you are, you will not disappoint him. But baby, you must look around.  I, his wife, will be sitting on the next table. My husband and I, we are a breed of married couples you are not aware of.

You see, honey, you didn’t realize it but you are being played!

You mentioned ‘experiment’. Please don’t mind this experiment. Since you are anyway thinking that you are ‘helping’ us through our relationship in your own charming way, I am sure you wouldn’t mind what I am about to tell you. You see, man (and woman) is a polygamous animal. We all wish to have, or at least try what we don’t have. Some ignore it and supress it, some enjoy it.  My husband and I enjoy being a part of each other’s animal essence. We are partners in what you call as crime. You think bringing waxed legs and sexy lingerie every night to the bed will ‘save’ the relationship? I can’t wait to see you settle down and see your husband running around looking for a pair of relaxed legs in an old pyjama.

Moreover, my man being desired by another woman makes me look at him in a new light. I see him as my XXX Santa Claus spreading joy. He loves looking at me being served, being desired. So you might also find me meeting someone ‘very casually’, in a bar maybe. But you should look around even then. You will see my husband in a corner.

So let me tell you what will happen from what I will be seeing from behind my glass of iced tea. My husband will be his charming self. You both will talk about many things. And from the distance I will be able to make out almost everything because this wouldn’t be our first time. I know the topics. Then he will stare at you with wishful eyes while you would be laughing. And you will suddenly stop and blush and say “what happened!” To which he will reply, “It is so nice to see a woman laugh her heart out. Your eyes sparkle when you laugh.”

And you will fall for it. And you will assume that the wife must have stopped laughing. You will lean towards him and touch his arm as if in sympathy. And your touch will make my cheeks red, my hair stand, my skin flushed, my tummy curl. And I will take a gulp of iced tea to wet my dry throat. I will lick my lips. And I will wait for him to take you somewhere. And soon he will. And when it is all over, back home, in our balcony, we will sit in our easy chairs with a glass of wine in our hands and he will tell me all about you. And your skin. Then we will talk about me and him, and our likes and dislikes. As you so desire for us, we will have a wonderful conversation full of laughter.

You mention his hands sliding over your sexy skin. I will tell you what happens. I like that he touches you, and others like you, whenever we decide to. Believe it or not, it makes him appreciate my skin even more, my lady parts too. And me.

Well, you must think that we must be crazy to ‘share’ each other. You might even resort to blaming us for not being in love. I will just suggest to you to try it sometime. It makes us have faith in our relationship. It makes us not feel guilty for looking at someone. It makes us accept compliments with more ease. It makes us satiate the animal within us. It makes us appreciate each other. It makes us share our deepest secrets. It makes us indispensable for each other. It makes us be true friends. It brings us closer. It makes us feel emotionally secure. Now that is where I wouldn’t be able to share him.

(Also, dear woman, let me not even start on the issue of you putting all responsibility of what you think is a failed relationship on the women in this dynamics, because I absolutely do not wish to transgress from the topic. You are demonizing the ‘lazy’ wife. And you are demonizing the horny ‘other’. Now what is that about!)

Anyway, relax sweetheart. It seems you are a very naïve girl. Well I am a woman. Let me tell you. Sex is very simple. Do not complicate it. It brings us pleasure. Do not ruin it. If you don’t want to be a part of this, stay away. But don’t glorify yourself. This is way bigger than what your little mind can imagine.

Basically, the point I am trying to make is, please do not worry about us. Do not worry that we aren’t experimenting enough.

The next time a committed man smiles at you with eyes full of lust, you silly silly girl, think about it, what if you are the experiment!

Author's Note:

"This specific article is in response to an article that was published by your website titled 'I am so sorry I have a thing for committed men. Your boyfriend will soon be sleeping with me but it’s not my fault, it’s yours'. While I was reading this article, I felt as if I had a response to every sentence that was written. I also saw all the appreciation and while my congratulations to the author are due, I felt that people are not ready to move out of the stereotypical idea of a femme fatal. The image of the femme fatal, the saviour of the feminine ego, in our hostile society is always the 'other' woman."

I wish the world could see beyond the stereotypical relationship dynamics: a cheating yet guilty husband, a dull yet doting wife being saved by the b****y yet noble other. Well, I am a loving wife to a wonderful husband. And we are best of friends. And in our relationship, I am the femme fatale.

Editor's Note:

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