Here I am writing my story with a hope that someone will listen to me. I just wanted to share everything because now I am tired of hiding, tired of giving fake smiles, tired of pretending to be happy. It all started a year back when I met this guy who claimed that he loves me not from a day or two but for the past 10 years.

And I being the stupid one believed everything he said.

Our first one month together was good but then he started controlling me. And again stupid me, I just thought that he loved me that's why he is being protective. I never thought that all my dreams will turn into a nightmare. A nightmare which would never let me sleep again. That guy didn't allow me to go anywhere, I was not allowed to move out of my house without his permission but whenever he was calling me to meet him I should be there irrespective of the time. I was not allowed to talk to my friends, not even my brother. He never spent a single penny on me. He always asked me to pay all the bills. I always asked him that from where will I get the money since I was not earning anything, but he was not bothered. Once I said to him that I will do a job but he didn't allow me to that. You people must be thinking why I was still there in such kind of a relationship. It was not because of love but because I was scared.

Whenever I told him that I am going to end all this, he always said if I leave him, he will die. Sometimes he would use a blade to cut his hand, then sometimes he would just jump from somewhere. I don't know why he did all this. I used to fight a lot. Sometimes he used abusive language, sometimes he slapped me also. And you know what my mistake was? I would sleep early or sometimes I moved out of my house without his permission. Things were not in my control. I thought of discussing it with my parents. But as I belong to a small town where pride is very much important, I knew no one would understand me. I used to cry a lot, I didn't know what would happen. The only thing I knew was that I wanted to come out of it anyhow. I also tried to commit suicide just to end everything but somewhere I knew this was not the solution.

After sometime, my mother came to know about this. She took away my phone and I was not allowed to move out of the house.

You won't believe but I was very happy after receiving this punishment. At least now I couldn’t talk to him. He was continually threatening me by sending messages that he will die or spoil my name in the society. To be very honest I was scared then too. I didn't know what would be the solution to end this. Meanwhile, my parents arranged my marriage. Well, trusting a stranger, after all, this was difficult. Despite all that happened, I was trying to be happy in my new relationship. Something good was happening after a very long time. I was happy but deep down somewhere I was scared what if he ruined everything.

Will my fiance understand me, will he be with me by my side? I was very sure that he won't.

Then one day my ex sent some of our pics to my fiance and then I was sure that my engagement will be called off. But thanks to my good luck, he understood me and is still with me. I still can't believe how this happened. He accepted me with my past. But still my ex is bothering me, he is still trying to ruin my relationship. I don't know what to do. My fiance always tries to cheer me up but deep down somewhere I am still scared. Scared of his abusive language, scared of all those threats. I wish I could just delete that one year from my life.

The only thing which I want today is to live peacefully.

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