feminism mother-in-law daughter-in-law patriarchy indian women indian family dominance saas bahu

My Mother-In-Law Can't Ill-Treat Me Any More Because I Have This Solution

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

I am an extraordinary homemaker and an ordinary woman. I have been granted the ability to multitask since childhood by God's grace. But here at my husband's place, I am just a maid needed for washing utensils and cooking food. It is the equation with my mother-in-law which makes me think sometimes, why am I listening to all the nonsense?

Will listening to all the illogical blames make her love me like her own family? I guess not!

This lady is someone who fits only in the backward class of society. The part of society who loves to torture their daughters-in-law (the girls who are always outsiders) by blaming her for no logical reasons. Like if the moonlight is dim, so this girl is the cause; the wind is fast, this girl is the cause. Like really? Everyone else in the family including my husband and his father says she is like that, so I have to listen to her and ignore like they do.

But I ask, why should I suffer and tolerate this nuisance on my mental health? What wrong have I done to her?

She says that I brought misfortune to the family since the day I stepped in. I am from another state but so what because I am from the same community? She even loves to blame me for using more water and shampoo while bathing and putting extra milk exclusively in my tea. Petty things like this she loves to stir up, the list goes on and on. However, I don't support such behaviour of her's and both my hubby and father-in-law agree that her mentality is not good but no one has the courage to say anything to her in strict words because she creates a scene by shouting and crying so loud that neighbors can hear and make out that something is wrong. So I am asked to just listen to her and carry on with what I want to do. But I will not give in. After 2 years of marriage, I feel I have failed to gain her love and I decided not to try anymore by not by listening, to be precise. She is aged and needs attention.

I know that but she is like this since her teenage years so that’s not my fault. I am no bojh on anyone, I know how to respect my elders but in her case, I just have this to say to her:

Sorry lady, I will no more ignore it as I am legally married to your son and it's my home too. My beloved hubby is a mute obedient son so he will make his wife suffer, weep and cry but will not say anything against you but why should I? I am tired of trying. You mess with me then you must be prepared to face the same. I can mess back with you and can turn your head into a garbage bin too.

Love(?), Your not so lovely daughter-in-law AKA Chhuchunar (she refers to me by this name with her daughter over phone calls)

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