My Husband And I Have Decided Not To Have Kids Because We Love Travelling

Priyanka Kandoi Priyanka Kandoi in Single Women Bad Women on 2 July, 2017

I am not kidding when I say that I do not want kids, not now, not ever. Just like every human has a brain but not everyone chooses to use it, similarly, all women possess a uterus, but not all of us ‘choose’ to ‘use’ it. How difficult is that to comprehend?

It is just a matter of personal choice.

I know enough blogs are talking about this topic on the Internet these days and I might just be reiterating a few of their points below. But, some people are hard of understanding and you need to tell them the same thing over and over again. Sadly, though, they still may not get it.

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So some kids are adorable and most of them are not. They are little monsters in disguise. The few that actually make it to the adorable list are the ones you are biased towards. For everyone, there is at least one such kid in their life. It might be your own child, your niece, nephew, or your godson/goddaughter.

I too have one such kid in my life and she’s a precious little thing who I love to bits, but at the same time she inspires me every single day of my life to ‘not’ have children of my own. The reasons are obvious:

I am already fat. If Kareena Kapoor can look like a hot air balloon with a child (even though she carried herself beautifully), I may just explode! Trust me, I have a hard enough time trying to look thin, deleting pictures that reveal the layers and tires of flesh, cribbing about life being unfair when I have to stop myself from eating those chocolates whereas my skinny friends can hog on them still fit into an XS sized dress. Why on earth, then, would I get pregnant and make my life worse?

I’m a super lazy person. Plus, I love myself more than I love anyone else. So I just cannot take the huge responsibility of bringing a baby into this world and raising it. In fact I feel if I were to give birth to a child, despite knowing my own shortcomings, it would be truly selfish. 
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I love to travel. And I love to travel luxe. Traveling on a budget just doesn’t work for me. And of course no matter how much we’d like it to be, travel isn’t free and you need a lot of money for it. And since my husband and I aren’t amongst the Ambanis and Birlas of this world, we have to prioritize our travel over the cost of raising a baby, because we can’t afford both. So I would rather see a different country every year instead of visiting ‘Mom & me’ stores. I would rather blow up 50,000 on a fancy hotel overnight than pay the kid’s monthly school fees. But you know what, if someday I can afford to do both (the kid and the luxury travel), I’ll go stay in an even fancier hotel!

I love doing ‘nothing’. I have mastered the act of doing ‘nothing’ but with a kid, there'd always be something to do and I can’t cope up with that. I find full-on reality exhausting because at a certain point everyday, I kind of hit a wall and think: that’s enough life for one day, thanks.

I wake up at 11 am, laze around all day long, go for an hour long yoga class, five days a week (which I manage to miss at least twice, because I have a whole list of excuses), laze about some more, watch Koffee with Karan under the covers because dear husband needs his sleep, and finally doze off at 3 am. Now who would give up this life?

Other things that scare me are: what if it’s a boy? I want a girl! What if the baby isn’t cute enough? What if we suddenly become poor and my dear little miniature self has to wear cheap clothes?

Due to an excellent arrangement I have with my husband, we are both in denial about me being an adult. And my poor husband isn’t capable of handling two kids! I just can’t bear the thought of a little version of me bossing him around; that right solely belongs to me.

Luckily, for me, my husband and I are on the same page. Neither of us wants babies. We’d rather give up sex! But there are many couples out there where the husband may want a baby but the wife isn’t interested. Please take this matter seriously and discuss such things when you’re looking for a life partner. Forget the ‘kundalis’ and match your thoughts and opinions instead. Personally, I feel the woman should have more say in the matter, but if the man really wants a baby, it’s for the couple to figure out.

Author's Note:

I do not mean to offend anyone with babies or those who like and would want to have babies. Like I said it’s totally a matter of choice, which should be respected. So the next time anyone annoys you with the ‘when do you plan to..’ question, just say ‘oh you mean my next vacation? Soon, very soon indeed!’