Mother Relationships Daughter Marriage divorce patriarchy

My Daughter Let Her Husband Do All Of This To Her And We Weren't Allowed To Help Her

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

I write this as a mother, about the miserable marriage her only child went through.

It was my colleague's son, and we thought who better than someone you know? They dated for one year, got engaged the next year, and we had them married the following year, as all our immediate family and friends had to have enough time to make travel plans. We threw a lavish wedding.

Two days before the wedding when we met at the hotel, they asked us what dowry we were giving, saying that their relatives will ask. I said my daughter hated gold, so she would only what she has. I wasn't giving money because I didn't know where they wanted to live. I said I would furnish their home, and that's all. There was a lot of talk about him getting a job in Dubai, so I thought I would wait for it to happen before making any such decisions.

Meanwhile, a lot of stuff was picked up from here, and furniture was sent to their rented house. We paid the deposit on the house and even paid for the honeymoon to Goa. In one month, two houses were changed as he was not happy with something or the other, and they finally settled in a nice 2 bedroom flat. He never seemed to go to work and whenever my daughter came home, she helped herself to food items bought in my home. One day, she even took cartons of milk. I casually asked her why she wasn't buying fresh milk, to which she replied that since he doesn't drink coffee, he doesn't buy milk.

She drove her own car, so if he wanted to go every day to see his parents, she would come home. They started telling her that girls must not be so independent. I was in shock.

Then one day, he wanted to go very late to see his mother, whom he had just met the previous day. She refused to drive him, saying that she had worked all day, cooked dinner, and was tired. He went away that night, never to return.

His mother didn't think it was her business to tell him to return to his wife. I paid the rent for six months and he never came back. My daughter asked us not to say anything to his family because they had not asked her or come to the house to find out what was wrong. I finally told her that she couldn't live alone and waste rent when we lived in such a big house.

She spoke with the landlord and asked for the advance. He told her that her husband had already given notice and taken the advance. So she came back to us. Now the worst part was yet to come.

He came to know that she was going to file for desertion when he sent her a divorce notice citing loose character, partying, and drinking. My daughter did none of the above. She met a lawyer and filed for a mutual divorce. He was scared that he would have to pay alimony, so he cooked up all these false allegations. He shamelessly came to the first hearing accompanied by gundas while she sat by herself. She never allowed her father or me to accompany her to the courts saying that was not what we deserved.

He took the mutual divorce and after the separation period, walked away after destroying my girl and us. Very soon, he got himself a bride from another caste and boasted to the world about how qualified she is. His parents continue to live a sham and we are just waiting for karma to pay back. We don't lack anything, except we can't find a cure for our broken hearts.

I gave up my job as I couldn't bear to see him, and he left soon after after people started asking him questions. Married and separated in six months!

Share This Story