My Abusive Ex Wants Me Back But I Won't Let Him Slap Me Again

Anonymous Anonymous in Single Women Bad Women on 29 June, 2017

Once my school was over, I moved to another state for further studies. The people and place were unknown, except a boy who was was my classmate in school. Later we became good friends.

In the initial days, we helped each other and gradually though we made friends in our respective colleges and hostels, yet we spent time with each other.

There was a time when he was completely dependent upon me, even though he had friends he felt lonely and my company was his only comfort.
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Months passed and one day he proposed me to be his love. I was completely lost in that moment, I had no idea what to say. I didn’t know what I wanted and after several thoughts, I accepted his love.

It was completely a different and new feeling and everything felt good. Time passed by and as I started to know him more, I realized that the person I knew and the person he was are completely different. I witnessed his anger for the first time and it was scary for me as I had never seen such kind of wrath and gradually he started to get angry for every silly thing. I saw his possessive side that warned me to even befriend other boys. He wanted me to spend most of my time with him, be it in class or after classes.

He started abusing me and my parents. I used to bear everything because I was madly in love and didn’t want to lose him.

What happened next I wish it doesn’t happen to my enemy either. My roommate became his best friend. I had no problem but what worried me was that he gave her more importance and could not even hear a single word against her. And on the other side, he abused me every day.

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She slept near me and every night he called her first and she talked to him while covering her face with a bed sheet and in a very low voice, which made me feel jealous. I wondered why she used to hide and talk because friends don’t do that. I used to wait for his call, which I received at 3 am, which always ended with fights for no reason and he used to cut the calls.

And every night I slept crying. I had never experienced such pain in my life. On the other hand, I was in deep love with him that I could not even consider a breakup.

One day he crossed all his limits and slapped me over a stupid matter and made me feel bad. He also insulted me in front of other people. I started to drown in depression and I lost weight. Everybody around me told me that I was a stupid person to bear him. After enduring so much of pain, I decided to end the relationship. Even my parents were against it because we belonged to different religions.

Gradually I realized, I mustn’t have fought with my parents for this person who didn’t even respect me. He also blamed me for the type of person he had become. I was so mindless to hear everything and didn’t utter a word back.

After 2 years of the breakup, he came back to me saying that he had changed as a person and was ashamed of himself for his deeds. And he said that it was because of me that he had transformed into a good person. But I can’t trust this man, once a brute, always a brute. I see this as a life experience.