I'm A Modern And Independent Woman: This Is Exactly Why My In-laws Don't Like Me

Anonymous Anonymous in Single Women Bad Women on 16 July, 2017

I got married four years ago. We met through a matrimonial site, talked on the phone all night and decided to get married.

We only spoke about our financial and familial commitments with each other that night, instead of discussing our likes, dislikes, passions and dreams - like most couples do. Five months after this conversation we got married, but I didn't feel happy. Back then, I didn't know the reason for my unhappiness. But today, I do.

From the first day of my married life to four years later now - I've felt empty and lonely. I was brought up in a modern family, as an independent woman.

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My in-laws dislike me for exactly these reasons, specially my father-in-law. To make matters even more difficult for me, my husband obeys his father and can't go against him, even for me.

When I first became pregnant, my father-in-law refused to let the doctors perform a C-section surgery on me. Due to his stubbornness, I lost my baby. Despite watching me in so much pain, my husband couldn't step up for me. I became numb after losing my baby. I felt like all my dreams were shattered. After this period, I just wanted a child, again. I became pregnant once again and this time went through a C- section surgery. My life changed after having a child. My husband stopped desiring me, altogether. He never praised me, but now, after having a child, it seemed like he didn't even notice me.

So many questions keep running in my mind. "Does my husband even love me?", "Did he marry me only because I accepted all his financial commitments?", "Am I not beautiful enough for him?"

I am a 30-year-old girl who became a mother to her 31-year-old sister-in-law, right after her marriage. Did I deserve all this just because I got married? Why should I leave my one year old son at my in-laws' place and stay alone to earn money just to fulfill my husbands' debts? I just wish to ask you, my dear husband: What is love for you?

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I accept that you are a caring man, but why do you lack in your duties as a husband? I cannot beg you to pamper me, to hold my cheeks and praise me. Can you never tell me that I am beautiful? If you continue being the same, I may just fall for someone else who satisfies me emotionally. Please love me like a husband. I understand that your mother is not here to take care of your sister, but your father can look after her, can't he? I love you and as your wife, I deserve to be loved by you too. No one else can fulfill your role of a husband in my life.

Please love me.