He Was Very Sure Of His Love For Me But I Was Sure I Wanted To ‘See’ Him First

Anonymous Anonymous in Single Women Bad Women on 7 October, 2017

I am a very simple girl from a simple family. I am the only daughter of my parents and the only sister to my brothers. I think I was the most pampered and loved child in my family. Because I was a part of an extremely loving family, I never thought of being with a guy or even going out with anyone else.

I had many friends who were boys but no ‘boyfriend’ as such. Life was so good.

I was supposed to leave my family and live in another city when it was time for me to join college. I couldn’t stop crying.

Even the thought of living without my family gave me chills. I knew I would have to live with unknown souls in a strange place (hostel).

I gave all kinds of excuses to my parents. But they wouldn’t hear any of it. They wanted me to go so that I could create a good future for myself. I was lonely and hardly made any friends because I simply could not get over the memories that I had of my family life. 

A couple of months later, my parents gifted me a cell phone. Not many people had a cell phone at that time. I was on top of the world because I could talk to my family at any time and stay connected with them now. One day while surfing the web, I created my profile on a social media site. My friends told me that I could stay connected with my friends and relatives back home through this site. They said that it was a comparatively cheap way (at that time) of keeping in touch with my loved ones.

My whole world seemed closer to me now because I had my cell phone and I had my account on this social media site.

I didn’t notice this immediately, but I started getting missed calls on my phone. I was a new cell phone user and thought this was normal. But it was not. The missed calls increased in number every day. I noticed that the numbers were similar every time. Whenever I picked up the phone and said, “Hello…hello…hello” there was no response from the other end. This continued for a couple of months.

One day I was p***ed off about something and the same number flashed on my cell phone. I screamed into the phone and asked, “Who is this? If you do not speak up, I will never pick up your call the next time!” I heard a voice which said, “Hello” from the other end. It was a male voice. I was not able to believe my ears.

This call ended the suspense of two whole months. I asked, “Who is this?” He said, “A friend.” He said he got my number from the social media site in which I had created my profile.

We soon became friends and moved on to become good friends and best friends. We spoke for hours and hours. Sometimes we spoke for the entire day and sometimes for the entire night too. I somehow started feeling less lonely now because I had this voice with me at the other end. He was no longer a stranger to me.

One fine day, he proposed to me. He had just heard my voice. He was proposing to me without even seeing how I looked. He did not even know who I was.

I warned him but he was sure. I was stunned. But on my part I was sure that I did not want to commit to anything without ‘seeing’ him. We continued chatting in the same way for all the 4 years of my college life. I was now in my last semester after which I had to go back home. So I told him that I wanted to meet him. He came to meet me. I was not so happy. I thought to myself and said, “Was this the guy I had wasted so much of my time with?  Was I talking with him?”

I didn’t like him because I didn’t like his looks. It did not even occur to me that probably he was thinking about me in the same way.

I hardly cared about what he thought about me because I was so sure about myself. I went home, switched off my phone and changed my number. I had no contact with him for over 2.5 years. I kind of forgot about him and started with my new job.

One fine day while visiting my profile on the same social media site, I realized that it was his birthday that day. I thought of calling him. I didn’t know why I had still saved his number. I called up and a voice picked up the phone. It was the same voice. I said, “Happy Birthday!” He said, “Thanks” and called me by my name.

I said, “You remember?” He said, “I never forgot!” I was touched.

I talked with him for some time and we realized that we worked and lived in the same city. So he asked if we could meet. I don’t know why but I couldn’t say, “No.” We met.

I didn’t like him this time too. I didn’t like the way he looked.

But I was polite and courteous with him as it was his birthday. He now had my number. He used to call me but I ignored his calls most of the time and told him that I was busy. Sometimes, I had really short conversations with him out of courtesy.

I was about to leave my job as I was tired of the culture of my current work place. I told him about it. He wanted to meet me again. I thought of meeting him one last time so I went to see him. That is when he asked me why I didn’t like him.

I was rude and insensitive enough to tell him that I didn’t like the way he dressed or looked. He said, “What if I improved on that?” I didn’t have an answer.

I told him that he had one month’s time to do so because I was serving my notice period. We met again as planned after a month. To my astonishment, he was a totally different guy. He had changed. He looked good. I told him what I felt. He wanted a reply for his proposal. I said I still needed time. He convinced me about not leaving the city and helped me find a better job. I got another job. In fact, I got a job in the same company that he worked for. We met quite often because we worked in the same office. Our timings were different but we still managed to meet.

I looked forward to meeting him now.

We had become good friends by now and in fact we became the best of friends again. It was his birthday. He was hosting a house party at his place. He lived with 3 other boys. I got a special invite too. I was in a dilemma and wondered whether I should go or not. But I thought about it for a while and did not want to disappoint him on his birthday. So I went to his party. We had loads of fun and I enjoyed myself there. Gradually I started visiting his home more frequently. If I was not going home on a weekend, I ended up at his place.

I don’t know how it happened but I think I eventually started liking him too.

I did not disclose this to him. I was a grown up girl by now and was working and earning well. My parents had started looking out for an alliance for me. I did not even tell them that I was over-friendly with this guy.

Somewhere at the back of my mind I was still confused.

I met a couple of people and tried to get along with them. Even this guy knew about all this. He did not intervene because he did not want to force anything on me. I realized that I did not like any of the other guys that I met.

My phone friend was on my mind all the time. I came back and told him about my feelings. He was super elated.

We convinced our parents and have been married for the past 5 years.

Author's Note:

No one, not even I, was sure about him. But now I am sure that I cannot be without him.

Editor's Note:

Share this young woman’s story because often we all get carried away by the looks of a person. Looks are superficial and cease to matter after a while. True beauty always lies in inner beauty.