Finding A Man I Wanted To Marry Was How I Ended Up Drowning In Disappointment

Anonymous Anonymous in Single Women Bad Women on 26 December, 2017

I'm a 28-year-old woman. So you can imagine how much pressure I have from my family to get married.

I'm in my final semester MBA and my family reasons that its high time I got married. My mother, for some reason, insists that I should get married by March.

I signed up on Shaadi, Jeevansaathi, BharatMatrimony, you name it. I was completely up to find my "soulmate" by myself first.

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One of these profiles connected me with Mr P. He sent me a request and expressed an interest in meeting me the very next day with his family, even though they lived 100 kilometres away from my place.

Everything appeared perfect- his family, temperament, personality and even his looks. My mother only had a problem with how much he was earning. She didn't think it was enough.

He earned less than 10 lakhs per annum, but I belong to an upper-middle-class household where we earn at least five times as much. My parents had their misgivings about him for this reason.

We still spoke to each other and we met twice after our first meeting. After his vacations, he returned to Pune and I realized that we had become very close. So I decided that I would have to be prepared to fight with my parents to marry him. I asked him to give me some time so I could communicate with my family and help them see how compatible we were.

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My match and I shared everything. I didn't begin my day or go to sleep without talking to him first. We would talk on the phone for hours. But like everything else, it didn't last forever. My happiness certainly didn't last very long.

After two weeks of speaking with each other, he stopped responding to my messages. I thought he was busy and caught up with friends and family. I pinged him but I didn't get a reply.

After two days, I got ONE message from him. When I replied, he disappeared again. I grew impatient and began texting him again. At that point, he lost his cool and yelled at me.

"DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH ME? IF YOU DO, YOU CAN TELL ME RIGHT NOW!"

Like the kids say these days, I got "seen-zoned". He would look at all my messages and never bothered to reply. I was very depressed and disappointed by his behaviour.

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I wondered if he had found another girl and I would have appreciated it if he had let me know. In the meanwhile, I was rejecting other men because I really liked him. I wasn't even in a position to give a suitable explanation to the other people I was rejecting.

We had gone a long way in sharing our lives and dreams with each other. We had spoken about our families, how we dreamt about our marriage, and even fleshed out the details of our honeymoon. You can imagine why I was hurt by his behaviour.

It was very difficult for me to move on because from my side, I had committed to this relationship. Now I don't know how best to carry on from where I am. I need to know where to find a clue.

Editor's Note:

Share this story if you agree that just because we have no "official rules" for arranged marriages, it doesn't mean you can make women a casualty of your whims.