Yes. I Fell For Another Man After I Got Married And This Is Why I Didn’t Feel Guilty.
This is the first part of my story: He Made Me Fall In Love With Him 4 Years After I Had Rejected Him And Now He's Gone.
Every girl dreams of having a great professional and personal future for herself.
I too am an educated woman and dreamt of becoming successful in the corporate world before entering into matrimony.Share this quote
I was 23 years old when Golu’s family expressed their interest in getting him married to me. I had just started working at that time and I was quite ambitious. Golu was 7 years older than me. My parents were pressurizing me to get married to Golu because he was based outside India and had come down for just a few days.
I was not ready for marriage at that time. I wanted to focus on my career.Share this quote
I knew I would be forced to get married quickly because he was already 30 years old. Then the next expectation would be to have babies quickly because he was 30.
Like all normal girls, I too thought about all this before taking my final decision.Share this quote
He was not aware of all the pressure that my parents were putting on me. So I just sent him a Facebook request because I wanted to give him a chance. But he did not accept my friend request at that time. So I thought that maybe he too was not very interested in going ahead with me.
It was sheer coincidence that he re-entered my life again when I needed him the most. He did accept my friend request after several years and my life changed forever after that.
So I moved on with my life. I did not know that he would come back and create a whirlwind in my life later.Share this quote
But at that time I just started focussing on my career again. I achieved all of my goals by the age of 25. My parents then decided to get me married to a boy who was our family friend's son.
I had known the boy for a long time and did not think too much about it when I agreed to marry him. I never knew that getting married to him would be the biggest mistake of my life.Share this quote
This guy too lived outside India. So after our engagement, we shared a long distance relationship. We couldn't talk very frequently with each other because of the time zone difference and our job timings. He came to India 10 days before our wedding date and I got married to him.
But I sensed something fishy from the very first night of our marriage.Share this quote
His friends had booked a hotel room for our first night. But he was so ill that day that he just took some medicines and slept immediately after that. I cried my heart out because I had never dreamt that I would spend my first night in this manner. We then got busy with post-marriage ceremonies but he never touched me at night.
I was yearning to be loved by my husband. I tried to get close to him but he never responded in any way.Share this quote
I flew to the country that he was working in after a few days. I thought I would be able to start a new life and a new career there.
But as soon as I reached his place, he confessed to me. He said that he was in love with a girl who belonged to a different religion. His parents had refused to accept that girl as his life partner.Share this quote
He then said that he had been pressurized by his parents to get married to me.
His words seared through my soul. Every word pierced through my heart like a knife.I could not divorce him or discard him from my life. I live in a society where a girl is judged every second.Share this quote
And getting a divorce is not so easy. My parents were so proud of their son-in-law. My husband had created a very good impression on them. I knew I would never have the guts to tell all this to my parents.
Frankly speaking, my husband turned out to be a decent person. He could have used me and his girlfriend too. But he did not do any such thing.Share this quote
So though we are married we live like friends in our own house but for the outside world, we are a married couple. I was all alone in a new country and had nothing to do. So I focussed on my career there.
I was married yet led a life of a single woman.Share this quote
It was at this time that Golu entered into my life again. And this was the time I fell in love with him completely.
A woman will violate the sanctity of a marital bond only when there is something wrong in her marriage. All women value marital bliss. A woman does not become a "whore" or a "slut" or a "cheater" by choice. More often than not she takes this kind of an extreme step only because she has a strong reason behind it. So don’t judge a woman without knowing what she is experiencing in her marriage. Your perspective may turn out to be faulty.Share this quote
Let’s learn not to worry too much about what the world thinks about us. It is always more than enough if we are at peace with our conscience. Let’s share this story and learn not to judge and condemn people so quickly, harshly and crudely. It is fine if we are not able to understand them or their decisions or the way they lead their lives. But we really have no right to add to their pain by giving them such ‘labels’.