This Is What I Did When My Husband Told Me About His Extramarital Affair

Anonymous Anonymous in Dirty Picture on 11 August, 2017

My husband confessed of infidelity to me just six days before I celebrated my 35th birthday. It was a night to remember.

“I have become close to a woman and I have slept with her. Please help me so that I can get out of this relationship.” He said. His eyes were filled with guilt and tears were streaming down his eyes. I stood there like a stone, numb to the bone and just said one sentence, “Go to her!”

The first question that came to my mind was, “What was lacking in me? Was I a bad wife? Had I aged fast? Were my looks a problem?” I did not shed a single tear in the dead of the night. All I could do was think of how he could just give up on 10 years of our relationship. How could he forget that we had a son? A son who was born after seven long years.

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That night, I mustered up enough courage to speak to the woman. I asked her to stop the affair. She just replied saying that, “We love each other!”

My husband sat beside me and showed me all the messages that they had exchanged. He told me how he wanted to get out of the relationship that he had with this woman.

But at the other end, I had to deal with this woman who was a divorcee and a mother who refused to budge from her stance. However, the next morning, she messaged my husband and told him not to contact her anymore. Now I regained my composure.

I mustered up enough courage to speak out. I kept asking him questions every day for several months. I slowly got all my answers. It was not my fault. It was my husband’s and that woman’s fault. They were colleagues and shared a lot of time together and this had progressed to such a devastating stage.

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Every time my husband tried to get back on the right track, she would take the initiative to get him off the track. She would put everything in the ‘hands of God’. All she was doing was putting an illicit affair in the hands of God! As though God will send another woman’s husband to settle down with a divorcee!

A week later, she sent a message to my husband again asking him how he was. My husband informed me about the message. But I did not feel insecure. Nor was I scared that they might get back with each other. But yes, I could not control my anger. I messaged back asking her to stop contacting my husband. But she was adamant. So I just ignored her because I was sure my husband was not lying this time. I knew he wanted to mend our marriage and that he loved me.

I have already forgiven my husband but I will not forget the pain and the trauma that I experienced. While my husband continues with his efforts of putting back all the broken pieces of our marriage together, I am haunted by just one question, “Why?” I don’t want to ask this question to my husband. I want to ask that woman why she did this to us.

She was a woman I knew. She knew my sister and they had been colleagues too. How on earth could a mother ever ruin another person’s home? In fact, she is 5 years older than us and I always thought she was very mature and had sound moral and family values.

Now, I laugh at my husband’s choice because sexually and physically she does not have a ‘wow effect’. Now my husband says, “Yes! I was so blind!”
Author's Note:

Even today, I still have to do my best to forget about their affair. Every day I feel like just going and punching that woman’s face. But I will not do that. I know my pain will subside and time will heal my heart.

Editor's Note:

Share this story because this couple really believes that courage, love, trust and forgiveness are some of the many values that are required to make a marriage work.