I Want To Believe In His Love But He's Still Married To Her

Anonymous Anonymous in Dirty Picture on 15 March, 2018

 

I was 15 years old when I first fell in love and he was sixteen. Right after our 9 months of relationships, his parents wanted him to go abroad to continue his studies but he refused. He wanted to stay with me but his mother knew I could convince him to go and so I did.

Without understanding what impact it could have on my relationship, I forced him to go. Initially, it looked like the long distance thing was working. Skype was our connecting agent and we used to cry, laugh, and love each other over video chat. He used to come down only once in a year. Those moments were the most precious and every time I met him, I hoped that he doesn’t go back to abroad.

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Long distance relationships make your love grow stronger but it create misunderstandings too.

When you are aware of the misunderstanding, it can be easily solved but the real problem begins when ego comes in between. We had a quarrel once and we stopped talking for a while. Meanwhile, I had become comfortable with one of my guy friends. We only liked each other and there was nothing more than a friendship in between us. That same time, my ex-boyfriend came down to meet me and found out about my guy friend.

As expected, we again had a big quarrel over him, but this time like a matured couple we solved the problem and he returned back to abroad. After few months, another quarrel followed and this time we didn’t talk for 6 long months.

I noticed that he changed his Facebook status to ‘engaged’. My heart skipped a beat and I immediately called him up. He said, “Yes, my marriage has been fixed with my cousin.”
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It was too shocking for me, and I could not do much as he was getting married at abroad.  Soon after the wedding, he returned back and tried to stay in touch with me. I refused to talk to him but it’s hard to resist your first love. To convince me, he even said that his wife knew about me and she was ok with us.

We had several meetups and talks thereafter. It was like a normal relationship but the bitter truth was he was a married man and he wasn’t mine.

It has been 4 years since he got married and for the past 10 years, we have been talking to each other. No matter how hard I try, I couldn’t stop myself from meeting him. My mind knew it was wrong but my heart wouldn’t listen.

He has a two months old child now and his relationship with his wife isn’t working smoothly.

He is affected by diabetes and cholesterol. He has also turned into an alcoholic and suffers from severe kidney conditions. The medical report shows that if diabetes is not taken under control, his health will deteriorate. Since then, I only wish to be with him so that I can take care of him completely.

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He has finally realised my importance and appreciates my presence. This makes me feel good that at least now I am visible to him and he keeps thanking me all the time.

I am 25 years old now and have no intention of marrying anyone else. I know it’s weird to accept him back into my life but he makes me feel loved.

And to think of, he has two months old child and a bad relationship with his wife, but simultaneously he has no one to take care of him. He is really sick and his wife is not with him anymore. He stays alone and all I know is that he loves me and I love him back. I can totally see the affection for me in his eyes. 

It makes me feel guilty to have a relationship with him seeing the two pity souls in his life. In our society, it’s wrong to share another partner when you are not divorced.

I can’t decide what to do now. Life has put me through some difficult situation and I don’t want to be the reason for his separation with his family.

I only wish to see him happy.

Editor's Note:

Share this story because you can't control who you fall in love with.