He's Married But We'll Always Be Best Friends With Benefits

Jasmeet Jasmeet in Dirty Picture on 6 August, 2017

Our generation is such that everything seems to be okay, having an affair with best friend’s love or sleeping with best friend or just have flings - all seems to be okay and we truly believe in Raat gayi baat gayi.

I had just finished my law studies and had joined a reputed law firm at a junior level. I was happy in the direction my career was moving but my love life was f***ed up, I had recently broken up with my long-term boyfriend. I was heartbroken and did not know what could avert this pain, so I started dating guys who I knew liked me and could do anything for me. I was emotionally down and was trying to find ways to come out of that agony but nothing helped. I was going around with a few guys but none of them stayed around for long as my heart was never with them. I decided to stop doing this to myself and to the other person who had true feelings for me.

I gave a fresh start to my life. I started concentrating on my work, started to connect with my friends, made some new friends and we used to hang out and eventually I forgot all about my past.

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One day we were all sitting at an old friend’s place and were drinking, playing different games, when my best friend Paritosh and I like always were in the same team. Our close friends had doubts that we were dating or after my breakup they thought we will start going around but it never happened as we did not have those feelings for each other.

The night went on, we all got drunk as everybody knew nobody was going to go back home. After a while I felt like getting some fresh air so I came to the balcony. I was standing there and looking around, feeling the fresh breeze on my face (my friend’s house was on the 10th floor and she had a lovely view from her balcony which was my favorite spot).

Seeing me there, Paritosh also came and we were standing there and talking. And then we kissed, don’t know why, what was going on in our minds but we kissed and it was a long one. 

After the kiss we both were breathless, we did not speak to each other for the rest of the night, as most of us were sloshed so everyone slept where they found place. But those who were a little better went to the guest rooms and slept. Girls in one room and boys in another. All just went to the rooms and crashed but I could not sleep. Every time I shut my eyes, I thought of the kiss with Paritosh. It all came alive, I knew I had to talk to him about it and I messaged him. I asked him what he was doing and if everyone was sleeping in his room. He said it was only two of them in the room and Romil was wasted. Paritosh, on the other hand, could not sleep either. 

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I went to his room and we spoke about what had happened and he said "It's okay, maybe it’s the liquor effect. It happens, we are friends" and he was giving me some random talk to me but I could not concentrate on his words.

I just hugged him, he was surprised and asked what had happened and I said, "I don’t know, just hold me." Slowly he started kissing my neck and the very next moment our hands were all over each other’s bodies, that thin line between friendship and lovers was long passed and we then could not stop ourselves. Early morning before anyone could get up I got back to my room and slept.

That day went by, Paritosh and I were back to being normal, there was no awkwardness.

The next day I called him home and asked him what was going on between us and he said "Nothing, you and I wanted to kiss, we kissed, we wanted to f*** we f***ed but that has not changed our friendship." I agreed. We were as normal as before and it was an awesome feeling where there was no commitment. It was good to be in a hassle free relationship, which was cannot be defined. Sometimes we met out of lust, sometimes out of need and then it became addiction.

This went on for years even after his marriage. I still remember the day before his wedding ceremonies were going to start, he came home as we knew we will not be able to meet for days together.

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He got married and I thought it was done but still we kept going back to each other, that had become our necessity. Though he was happy in his marriage, he kept coming back to me on nights.

I know it might sound ethically and principally wrong but some relationships can never be defined within the confinements of ethics or societal walls. Some relationships are just for your happiness and nobody can define it, not even you. It was not only for pleasure but it had some kind of satisfaction and those random one night stands completed my life.

The society might think that I am a w**** or a b***h but I don’t owe an explanation to the world, between him and I we have named our relationship 'Friends with Benefits'.