It was my birthday when I first saw him. And I guess it turned out to be the worst memory of my life. I met him through a common friend. This was a common friend, whom I liked, the friend who threw a party on my birthday. I feel sorry for him and I wish I could tell him how guilty I am now. When I met him, I wondered who is this guy and why did he come on my birthday party, but then he was a friend of a friend, so it did not matter much. That was my first impression of him, a big-built guy with a beard; honestly, he was looking ugly and old.

Slowly, we started partying together as I knew very few people since I was new in the city then. So, these were only people I had to hang out with. I started liking him. We drew closer and were often found talking, spending time, and partying together. One night, I was drunk, and we got intimate. Initially, our relationship was quite open, it was more on the lines of friends with benefits. He didn't like to chat much. He was a calm and silent kind of a person. I liked him. I started getting attracted towards him and later I realized I was in love with him.

Till date I don't know what feelings he had for me, but he did every possible thing a lover can do. And so, I was thinking that he is in love too.

A year passed. I left the city. But we were still in a relationship, at least according to me. Things seemed fine till the time I came to know about the girl he had started developing feelings for. I was trying to understand what went wrong, and how this girl came into the picture. The girl was a friend of his. I had always treated her well because she was his friend. I cared for her and had often invited her to my place, to spend time with us. But everything went the other way. The guy I loved cheated on me with the girl I cared for as a friend. I was hurt, I was devastated. But still, I explained to myself that it is okay because they were in love.

But one thing broke me for a life time, that my people whom I trusted more than myself, were responsible for me not being able to trust anymore, in life.

I am writing this here because I still want to know if he ever did love me? I was okay with what they had, but cheating was not the only option.

Share This Story