He Cannot Decide What He Wants More, Love Or Lust

Anonymous Anonymous in Dirty Picture on 18 December, 2017

I am a girl who was born and bought up in a place which had its own unique set of cultural and traditional values. I am the fourth child of my father and little sister to two brothers. My family is extremely orthodox, and parents are very strict. My sisters got married off. My family says that I am born with a silver spoon, I am far more blessed compared to others because I have everything in life, whatever I need. During my college days, I always had guys chasing me, wanting me to accept their proposals.

Not only am I a good-looking girl, but I also mingle well with others, and I am quite friendly, too.

I never accepted those proposals because I didn’t want my parents to bow down their head because of me, at any point. I didn’t want to hurt them. After completing my education, I moved to the city for my job. It was my very first experience away from home, and my parents – a new place, new friends. I loved my new life. It was there that I met him for the first time, even though he had graduated out of the batch before me.

When I saw him for the first time, I felt nothing. Once, when all of us were together for a day outing, to celebrate my bestie’s birthday, we had the most amazing time together.

I understood that he liked me a lot, just by the way he treated me and spoke to me. Soon after that, we exchanged our numbers. Initially, we were only good friends but later he proposed to me. He is an outspoken guy, with modern thoughts. Just like me, he mingles with everyone easily and is quite friendly. He has a great sense of humour, too. He loves what he does, and is a star performer at work.

He is also obsessed with fitness, and he would always say that fitness is everything to him. Being fit gives him positivity.

In his office, people would say that this man will break all the rules with his own code. Whenever there is an event at work, he would come forward and put effort into coordinating and executing things. He is an awesome dancer, too. Above all, the way he made me feel special, is what set him apart. Which girl would not fall for a man like him? He always gave so much importance to me. He always had time for me, even when he was busy at work. But I wouldn’t reciprocate with the same enthusiasm. The kind of love he gave me, no one can ever beat that. I thought of introducing him to my parents directly because he made my life so beautiful. Our relationship was like madness. He encouraged me in all aspects of life. He took care of me like a father does, of his daughter. He stood by me through ups and downs of life, spent money on me and wouldn’t let me spend a single penny.

He never took advantage of me, ever, because he is a feminist, too. He wanted me to pursue things that the society restricts us women from pursuing.

I knew that this man is the love of my life. Every girl could kill, to be with a man like him. He showed me the kind of absolute love, that a man in love can give his woman. Not even in my worst nightmare, did I imagine that it would all be destroyed in a single night. I got a call at around 11.40 pm, from a colleague. She asked me whether I was in a relationship with him, I knew that she was good friends with him. She confessed to me that they are, in fact, in a relationship for the past one year. All the life in me was sucked out, right there.

I didn’t know what to do. I cried like hell, he had cheated on me. How could he do that to me, when I was nothing but faithful to him?

All my dreams evaporated, in one night. I couldn’t breathe. I wanted to destroy him for giving me such pain. The worst thing, that I just couldn’t digest was that he slept with her around the time that he proposed to me. After expressing his love for me, he went and slept with her! After finding out all this, I called him the very next day. The three of us met, and he said then, “What I did to her was a big sin, but I truly love you.” He apologized to her, and confessed to her that he doesn’t have any feelings for her. Soon, the whole office found out about this and everyone pointed fingers at him. They told him to marry her. I left him, but I was worried about that girl. She threatened him that she will go to the police and ensure his parents end up in jail.

So he promised her that he will marry her, and at the same time, he begged me for a second chance.

I am not able to forget him. How am I supposed to forget someone who showed me that much unconditional love? I thought of forgiving him and giving him another chance, but then I wondered if he would repeat his actions again, and I’d end up being cheated again. Why did God give me this magnitude of pain, I really don’t know? After this, she came to my hostel, and out of courtesy, I met her. I later found out that she had only visited me to spy on me. She became a big problem in my life. She started telling me everything that he did to her, and it became very annoying for me to bear this weight. The time I had spent with him, and the memories we had together, made me a mental patient. I couldn’t get over him, the memories were haunting me, to no extent. He continuously asked me for chances and promised me that he will never marry anyone else. I started talking to him, again.

She noticed this, and complained about it to all my friends. Everyone bashed me and their words killed me. They advised me not to ruin my life, behind him. But I chose to stand by him, because of my love.

She also told everyone that I am spoiling her life. My hostel friends now see me as a devil. Every day, I see them pointing fingers at me and gossiping. I can hardly do anything about this. He introduced me to his parents and asked for the right time to talk to my parents. After this, to take revenge, that girl contacted my sister and disclosed everything. My parents are very worried about me and asked me to leave my job. I am unable to handle all this chaos. I am not able to breathe, eat, sleep while thinking about all this. I feel like I will hurt myself soon, out of depression. I want to come out of it all. I just want to lead a peaceful life, leaving everything behind.

I don’t think my life will ever be peaceful in future. I asked him to leave me, but now he is threatening me that if I marry anyone, he will share our private pictures with everyone.

Daily, he is torturing me that he will inform my parents about us. He stops me on the road and grabs my hands. He demands promises from me that I would never leave him. He has started inviting me to die with him, too. I really don’t know what to do, seriously.

Editor's Note:

Share this story, because we need to realize that two-timing is destructive.