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Falling In Love With An Army Man Made Me Vulnerable To The Worst Possible Life

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

My desire to be in the fairytale world of love has given me the scariest hell and the most excruciating pain in my life. This dates way back to 2015 when I was an engineer working for a multinational corporation, and dreaming of a beautiful life ahead of me. I am quite a charming, good-looking and feminine woman, but I never imagined that my appearance would become my biggest enemy one day. On 29th August 2015, I received a text on FB Messenger from a profile named “Maverick Adi” aka “Maverick Ansh”. He praised me for my good looks, and he seemed to be quite decent and polite. He told me that he is working with HCC and preparing for IAS, he was 28 years old, single, and was looking to get settled down. We started talking regularly, he understood me well and I was enjoying our conversations. In November that year, he planned to come down to Delhi to meet me.

When I met him, he seemed like an average looking regular guy. He happened to show me his ID card and I was stunned to see that he was from the Army and was serving as a major.

I got very upset because he hid this from me, and he tried to convince me by telling me the that he is not allowed to disclose these things on social media. Then, he told me that his alliance was broken recently and that he works in the security force. When somebody tells you about their problems, you often tend to believe them. Don’t you? I was just 25 years old, and I was like a free soul who was preparing for MBA. After a few more meets in Delhi, I told my mother about him and he spoke to my mother about his plans for settling down with me soon.

I had started seeing him like my husband.

In January, he invited me to Dehradun where he was posted as an instructor. I went there to see the city as I had never been there before, but he proposed me for marriage then, in an open area. Any girl who is well educated, beautiful and young would consider such a good proposal and so did I! And thereafter, I started making a series of mistakes one after the other, by trusting him as if I was blindfolded. When I stayed in Dehradun, I was under the influence of sleeping pills.

Being a patient of Fibromyalgia, I need to be relaxed, so I took a heavy dose in order to get sleep. My room door was left open so he came to my room and started undressing me. I was all numb and all I could say was, “You promised me that you will not touch me before marriage”. Although nothing could properly happen between us because I was all numb. After that he apologized to me in the morning and said that he is going to marry me. Huh! “Marry you” is the phrase that can melt any girl's heart.

After that, I surrendered myself to that person as I was seeing my future in him. Months after months passed, and he started behaving differently. He would use the so-called techniques of hot water and cold water treatment, without any mistake from my end. I call it hot water because in one moment, as per his convenience, he would be all warm and lovable towards me and at the very next moment, he would act like a complete stranger. I would get completely dumbfounded as I was not aware what was happening. How could I start to find the truth? I enquired from a number of people from the Army but I couldn't get to the truth and this torture continued to make me hollow day by day.

As a girl, it was very tough for me to leave him and move on to the next person, as I wouldn’t want to feel too many hands on me! That was a disgusting scenario, for me.

One day, I finally approached one of his senior's friends who revealed the ugly truth about him to me. This officer who was promising to marry me was not only already married but was also the father of two daughters. He was shamelessly playing around with my life. Upon hearing this, I was out of my senses and traumatized because I couldn't accept this fact. To me, the most horrifying thing was that he was not at all scared about any laws because of the power he had for being in the Army. I realized it too late.

I decided to lodge an FIR against him as it is very commonplace now, and this offense had to come to an end.

In the meantime, he had again started approaching me and asked me to take the complaint back anyhow. He tried all the tricks in the book with me, to make me withdraw my complaint because he knew me very well, my only weakness is my emotions. Again, he started telling me that he is not happy with his wife and wants to divorce her.

He said they are only together for the sake of their kids. “I love you only,” he assured me. I was called to the police station and he came along with me, showing them the affidavit that he will marry me, to which the police IO said that he is just fooling me again.

I went and asked him the same question and he asked me, “Can you find some other means of settling it, like taking money from me and finishing up the case?” I said to him, "Again you started playing, I don’t need your money!" I finally understood that he was just playing around and I had no idea what story he quoted to his family and in his office. I went to complain about this officer to IMA but nobody allowed me in. He came out of the academy and asked me to sit in his car and he would take me to meet his boss. I was traumatized but I sat and he drove me out of the campus. I was struggling to stop the car but nothing happened so I had a few pills which I consumed in the car.

I was in such a state of mind where in all my senses were just shut and I could not understand whom to trust and whom not to. I became numb after consuming the pills and him being his shameless self, in that condition he again tried to take advantage of me.

The next evening, his wife dropped by and threatened me. She also offered that she will divorce her husband so that I can marry him. I cut off all communication with them. After that, I called my mom and gave my statement to her, then came back to Delhi. All this time, I had been through ridiculous shit in life- faced threats, my social media account was hacked, my fake profiles were generated in a number of dating applications and porn sites, a fake case was registered against me as a counterblast.

After one year of this mess, I was still standing strong and contesting the case with the help of my team of lawyers. During these days, those who stood by me, were only my lawyers and my mom.

In the month of April, I received a call from a lady for a marriage proposal for her son. After that, her son started talking to me. Though I could have hidden all the facts from him, I revealed each and everything to this guy up front. Initially, he said that he would not tell anything to his parents and he will support me completely. Every night, I used to tell him the exact story. Months later, he came over with his family for the roka ceremony. And they fixed me. His father was a retired colonel and mother, a housewife. He had a business, dealing with security.

I never felt so good with a guy before, he treated me like a princess. I felt as if I am living the dream. My family was very happy because this was the first marriage of the family.

My family had a lot of expectations from me, all of my family members are very simple and humble people. My family went to MP to further finalize the roka, and just two days after the roka, he revealed everything to his father. His father asked for my file, which I gave them. And on July 7th, my roka was called off.

His father believed each and everything I went through, and stood by that army officer. I still remember him saying that, “Army will fully support the officer. And these things are quite common in the Army. India is India and Army is Army and you cannot win against the Army, you bloody b***h.”

I was humiliated to the core because my ex-fiance’s family did not believe me but believed the other army officer who was a charge-sheeted criminal. And to my utter surprise, the guy who made promises to me and said, “I am always by your side, I am going to wait for you for as long as it takes” and who called me his soul left me in this trauma, just because he believed what his father told him.

And just like that, all my truth and trust was set back to zero.

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