An Open Letter To My First Boyfriend: You Taught Me Everything

Anonymous Anonymous in Let's Face It on 5 June, 2017

To My First Boyfriend,

I know it has been a while since I stirred the topic of the bygone ‘Us’. And I do realise how pointless and unnecessary it seems now, to ink this letter. But for a long time I have been meaning to say a few things and I believe there is no reason to delay it further. I just wanted to share that it was you who taught me the real meaning of love. It has always been you and it will always be you.

You are this beautiful human being who is credited for the person I am today. You made me.

I know we ended our story on uncordial terms, but even today whenever we talk, even after so many years, the emotions are stirred and I feel the same compassion, warmth and connection. It has been four years since we walked our separate paths, yet somehow I still feel that I never moved an inch. That I never left from the start. 

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I still today, don’t feel even the slightest discomfort or shame in opening up to you and letting my guard down. I feel no fear in opening up my vulnerabilities in front of you. You are the most precious possession of mine. You have seen all my shades- my oscillating moods, my silly tantrums- and have always been there relentless and sturdy as my back bone. 

All I wish to say is 'Thank you'. Thank you for the late night conversations, for depriving yourself of sleep just to talk to me. I know we may never bring back that spark and togetherness, but I do cherish our relationship a lot and the friendship we were able to salvage in lump sums.

Thank you for handling my insecurities so respectfully. Thank you for still finding the ray of silver lining on the gloomy days. Thank you for finding the warmth in me and loving me above and beyond anything and everything. Thank you for untangling my confusion and teaching me the value of commitment.

I am grateful to you for teaching me to find the goodness in every being and being there for me through every storm. Thank you for wiping off my tears. Thank you for always having my back. I know, I cannot thank you enough.

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In the end I just want to say that thank you for being my first love and teaching me what love is and how to follow through.

Love always.