To someone who got away and will own a piece of my heart forever,
As I write this to you, I am filled with a whirlwind of emotions. I feel blissful that I found you but at the same time I shed a tear of sorrow, for you are no longer the same person you used to be.
But with time I guess you realized what I took forever to realize – just love is not enough for a relationship to work.
Despite the choices I had, I chose to be single because I'm withered and almost full to start all over again because I'm stuck, stuck in between still loving you and maybe trying to hate you. You have taken along a part of me with you, and I don't know if I miss that or I miss you.
I have loved you always, I loved you through every emotional part of the roller coaster you brought into my life. But I will always hate you for being the person who made me cry so many times that I lost the count. I often find myself wondering how greatly things would have worked if you didn't leave me there clueless. I have walked miles from that place but I still hope you'd return some day and tell me that you were lost, lost in the overwhelming thought of a 'forever' and all I would do is hit you hard, fight with you and then cry like a kid but as soon as I would be done, I'll hold you tight in my arms and would just wish to melt in your warmth.
I don't want to see you again but this heart loses the war to its mind every single time where I am in love with your smile, enchanted by your voice, those voice notes that keep me going for the day. I don't know why I keep defending you, not just in front of others but even in front of myself.
As I write this I will tell you as to why I have always obsessed over Mondler because deep down, I find another Monica and Chandler in us, still trying to find each other in this world full of Janices and Richards. You might have been just another person to a lot of people in the crowd but to me you will be my world, a huge part of my tiny world.
The last secret I want to reveal is that even after all of this, I would choose you over everyone else in the world, every single time under any circumstances, even if I get to have my heart broken. Again. I know you have it too, deep inside of you, and my love allows me to genuinely hope that you will understand it one day.
Come back soon. Come back for our 'forever'. Come back before you lose me in a glitch for like ever.