I want to make a humble request to everyone out there who is with a partner suffering from anxiety. You need to understand that your companion, that the person whom you love is different. He is special in his very own way, and he trusts you with his life and his mental peace.
He can be so caring that he will wake you up with a cup of coffee for he knows that you love it.
He will ask you not to go to a certain place because he feels that the place is not safe enough for you. Sometimes, he will be pissed at you for no damn reason, or possibly a reason that you aren't yet aware of.
Yes, it can feel like this person’s sensitivity is too overwhelming for you to take in.
However, take a step back and think of what’s actually going on, maybe all he needs at that point is assurance. During such times, a text that says ‘I love you’ or ‘okay, let’s talk it out’ can instantly calm down the storms in his mind.
Do not think for even a moment that he is dominating you. It is more about the fact that he cares about you a bit too much and doesn't want harm to come your way.
Use affirmations and assuring statements and see the change in him, he will calm down immediately. Is he apologizing a lot nowadays? Maybe something is bothering him. Go talk to him. There may be an artist in him or a poet or a dancer and trust me, you are his motivation. You are his muse. To deal with his anxiety attacks you have got to be patient enough. Take him out for a walk. Talk about his dreams. Tell him yours. Talk about what you love and ask him what he is afraid of. Ask him what bothers him the most. Ask him about his mother's dream and tell him what all you ate that day. Ask him about the football match he lost recently and tell him about the new skill that you want to learn. Tell him how badly you want to learn to ride a bike, if at all you do. He will narrate to you his life and show you how special you are and why not? Out of all the commoners, you chose a special one like him.
You chose a mind so beautiful that it swims in the depth of the ocean without drowning; a mind that can talk about the blue sky enthusiastically and then argue why Ravana was not the bad guy. He has a mind that can broaden one's perspective, a soul so energetic that can make a walk in the park feel like an adventure, a soul so colorful that for him, life isn’t just all about the black and the white.
And my dear reader, if you plan to leave him then don't cut him off. It is not that he cannot take rejection, in fact he might possibly be quite well versed with it. But if you cut him off with no proper justification, without answering all his questions, without seeing him for one last time, he will never get over you.
He will lay wide awake every night thinking about you, wondering where he went wrong and what screwed everything.
He might text you and call you up at 5 am in the morning to ask you things like: ‘I have stories to tell you, who is going to listen to them if you don't?’, ‘I loved you so deeply, so immensely. Why do you want to leave me?’ And trust me, you won't have answers. Gradually, he will stop texting you and you will assume that everything is okay, that he is doing good now. Well no, he is most probably dying every day. He must be talking to nobody and writing down everything.
One fine day you will get a text from an unknown number because you had possibly blocked him. The text might have read that he still loves you and wants you back.
So please keep in mind that if you do plan to leave him, make it gentle. Talk to him and explain it to him considerately. Don't just end it at ‘I don't want this’. He will be cursing himself every day for the things that he probably didn't even do and for the love that he had for you. I can vouch for him. He loved you more than anybody possibly could. I've been through this personally and believe me, I know what he feels like. My love left me too and so today I am writing for you.
Go! Go! Go! Go hug him. He needs you. Thank you!