This Is Exactly Why You're Failing At Finding 'The One' For You

Sshahamat Hussain Sshahamat Hussain in Life Is Tough on 8 September, 2017

Glittering social media platforms have changed the definition of relationships. In the Tinder generation, we have forgotten to value our relationships. The online social media has opened numerous ways to find people like you, who you like, but then there is always a better choice. The continuous chain of relationships and lifestyle youngsters lead have given more importance to one night stands, more than friendships, relationships, but less than lovers or just relationships with an expiry date.

The bond and feeling in a relationship has become more about 'Public Display of Affection'. Your personal life is no more personal. In this vicious circle of dating, breaking up and repeating this idea of love, has become made us more ‘vulnerable’. There is always one person who will like you for the person you are. But, somehow amidst all this, the charm of ‘holding on to a relationship and working on it has disappeared’.

In the quest for finding ‘the one’ are we exploiting ourselves? Maybe we have got the one and we let him/her go because we could not work on that relationship. We saw problems more than the love we had. Blame it on the social media platforms but the truth is every break up is making you shallow bit by bit.

The insecurities are growing and we are becoming more self-indulgent than working on the relations we have. It’s not just about the romantic relationship we have with our partners. It also hampers our best friends, families and relatives. We are becoming intolerant towards our associations.

You upload a selfie of yours and get responses from two hundred people on how good you look. The likes on Instagram and Facebook is the new validation for our identities. These are making you shallow. It's making you think that if your relationship does not work out, there is always a chance to find better. The number of followers you have defines what status you hold. However, the question is are you the same person that you portray yourself to be on the social media?

The way people have started reacting on social media is gross. You have an opinion on everything and anything but we have forgotten that our reactions are hurting people. There is internet bullying, fat shaming and rape threats that are becoming common.

“I am not on tinder. I got a call from my friend asking me why I am on tinder. She sent me screen shots and I found out that somebody was using my pictures on Tinder. It took a lot of time to convince her that the account did not belong to me,” said Karan Mehta. Fake identities and profiles are also common on social media platforms.

Is it time we stop and reflect on our relationships? Should we start working on it and start solving issues rather than jumping on to another relationship. Communication can solve problems and if it does not there is always an option of a breakup. It's high time that we stop looking for that 'one' being in a relationship already. We all have problems that can be solved.

We need to stop exploiting our emotions and start bettering ourselves rather than blaming and expecting a lot. Life is not a movie and there are very less “happily ever after” or maybe none. We need to make our love life happier and stop and rethink “why am I looking for the one?”.

If you are single, try harder but opt for a relationship that makes you a better person. Search for love, not sex and if you find one - hold on to it.