childhood MOTHERHOOD husband and wife trauma indian man

I Will Always Choose My Wife Over My Mother Because This Is The Kind Of Woman She Is

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

It so happened that when I was 10 years old, my mother got a job as a lecturer in a govt. college which was very far from where we lived. My father was too a professor in a govt. college.

She, however, chose her job over us.

The fights they had regarding it are still fresh in my mind. I never thought that she would actually leave us and go to pursue her job. She never cared about how her ten-year-old child will stay without his mother. She used to come to visit us only 4 to 5 times a year and during summer vacation. Rest of the months, she used to stay in her college quarters.

As a kid, I had always missed her. My father couldn’t cook so my entire childhood I had eaten dabba food or order it from the restaurant. I often used to bug my father by asking him why she left. Sometimes he remained silent; sometimes he would explain that this was what she wanted.

One day, she visited us and I was so happy to see her. But somehow, my parents got into some arguments and she left again.

My heart broke badly and I started asking God why she never thought about me. She could have easily continued to work where we were and had stayed together. But she chose not to and went away from us. Eventually, I started to dislike her and developed hatred feelings towards her.

As per the family background, I too pursued my studies well and finished my PhD.

I am a professor now and have kids too. After my marriage, my mother started to interfere with my life and would taunt my wife now and then. Once we even had to go live separately to control the matter. Things changed later and so dad called us back. I don’t know why but she keeps complaining about my personal life to other people and makes our life hell as all our neighbours now try to look at us with pity as though we are really unhappy.

She would tell people how bad her daughter-in-law is and how my father is a bad person.

Now I don’t understand why she is even back when I don’t want her anymore. I don’t speak to her much and to keep my family life peaceful, my wife and I are staying separately from my parents.

My father and mother stay together as both got retired this year. The trauma that I have gone through my childhood will never fade, although I am trying my best to forgive her as some of my friends suggested me to. My wife has made my life beautiful and we have a happy family. I wouldn’t want my kids to suffer from the same thing I suffered in my childhood. After reading this, I know some of you are going to judge me but I would request you to imagine what I must have gone through.

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