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I Lost Everything But She Gave Me The Strength To Fight For My Love And My Dreams

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

(READ THIS FIRST: I Waited For A Year To Talk To Her But By The Time I Gathered Courage, Everything Backfired)

Yes, in my life, a girl came. She's Neelu. We are actually best friends, but all the time we fought with each other for silly things. We both studied in the same class and I even asked her to help me with my love. She didn't help at all as we were always fighting. My graduation was about to finish, and one day I felt that I should choose my friend as my life partner. I asked her to marry me as we knew each other from childhood.

She got a fever for 2 days. After a month, she said how can I trust you? You loved someone else before and you still love her. But I said, just because I loved that girl, doesn't mean she loved me back. So I just want to move on. That is why I proposed to Neelu.

I told my family about my decision and they agreed on the condition that I would settle down in my career first. As usual, she didn't say anything at her home. The good thing was, my father and her father worked together. That gave me a bit of confidence.

Coming to my career, my passion was always to become an IPS officer, so I started preparing for it. But after 5 months, I realized that I should not lose Neelu like I lost Baagi, at any cost. So I kept my passion aside for a while and started giving interviews at IT companies to build confidence in my family.

With hard work and luck, both of us got placed in big software companies. Neelu was happier than me. On 24th October 2011, we joined our jobs. While I was signing my appointment letter, a teardrop fell on it. I was in pain that my passion and dream was going to die in that technological park.

In my induction training, our faculty asked everyone to talk about their dreams. Everyone wanted to be a good programmer, tester, or architect. When my turn came, I said I wanted to become an IPS officer. All were shocked and laughed at me. I smiled and assured them that they heard me correctly.

One project manager told me that fantasies don't come true in real life. As an engineer, he said I couldn't even get a constable job. That one year, I suffered hell. I felt out of place and I was lonely in that bunch of people. I wanted to tell Baagi that I wasn't a "waste time-pass fellow".

I used Facebook to speak to her and she replied that she didn't remember those days at all. I felt like I should let go of the past. She would rarely message me, that too on Facebook messenger.

Neelu knew everything and she encouraged me a lot to boost my strength. After a year, I joined coaching centres and somehow managed work and studies. During that time, I would wake up at 5 am and go to sleep at 1 am. I completed coaching and preparation, but I couldn't crack the preliminary round.

I had to attempt the exam again. But the Indian mentality is stupid. As soon as a girl crosses 24 years of age, marriage proposals start pouring in. That disturbed me a lot and I worried about the time it would take to crack the exam now.

So I bunked office one day and went to Neelu's father. I asked him if I could marry her with his permission. He was shocked. But in five minutes, he brought some cold drinks and poured it for me. He said he was very happy, but her mother might object due to caste problem.

I returned home silently, only half-happy. From then onwards, Neelu started fighting with her mom for me and her father supported her throughout. She even threatened her mother that she would commit suicide if she didn't agree.

Meanwhile, after a two-year follow-up, I wrote my exams again and got engaged in April 2016. I qualified the first stage and my marriage date got fixed. My good results and the assurance of my marriage gave me new hope. I will get married in November 2017.

This is one thing I have succeeded doing in life. I prepared for the next stage of my career. Right now, I'm in commando training for Telangana State Special Police. I am a commando of the Greyhounds and the nameplate puts a smile on my face every time. I am proud because I serve my state and nation, and I have to keep moving until I reach my true goal.

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