I was scheduled for a job interview at a new company. I saw the interview panel and thought I’ll check out the panelists' Facebook profiles. That’s when I first saw him.

I saw my JT’s (that’s what I call him) pictures with his beloved wife. They looked so happy together. I thought he was a nice family guy. However, since he was busy that day, someone else interviewed me in his place. I was hired and started working.

I met him for the first time at a team event. We exchanged smiles, spoke for some time, realized we are from the same town and immediately connected. I thought to myself, such a decent guy! I was so glad I found someone to talk to at work. 

We kept in touch after that and spoke about work related things every now and then. We even spoke to each other's spouses and praised them. He always spoke about his wife. 

After two years of knowing each other, we started working on the same project for the first time. He was my trainer for this project and so we ended up spending a lot of time together.

Then we decided to have lunch at the cafe one day. Evidently, we had started growing closer to each other; I shared my deepest personal issues with him, like my mom’s health and he told me about his life, dreams and passions.

After that day, we kept meeting for coffee, discussing our past relationships and heartbreaks. I knew I was becoming too fond of him; I did not even realize when I developed a crush on him.

One Friday evening we both stayed late at work, we decided to get dinner together at the company cafe. While talking about random things, he suddenly said, “I would definitely ask you out if I wasn’t married” and I replied immediately “I would say yes if I wasn’t married”.

Later, we drove back to the office together and he held my hand in the car. We hugged and kissed. He dropped me off to my car and said the magical words. We knew we were in love! Yes I was head over heels for my JT!

The next few days were full of love and romance! We went on lunch dates, had never-ending conversations while at work, secretly called each other while we were at home, he would drive by my house just to see my face over the weekends. It was nothing short of magic! However, fate had an obstacle waiting for us!

His wife found out about us while she was pregnant and after a few days, I discovered I was pregnant too with my husband’s child.

I felt so guilty. I told him I just want to be friends with him. I really wanted to focus on my pregnancy as we were having this baby after two miscarriages and I had wanted a baby so bad all this while.

Next few months were depressing. We both knew we liked each other but we couldn’t really be together. We still kept meeting frequently for lunch but spoke mostly about pregnancy. 

We then went on to have our babies while we remained friends. He had a beautiful angel and so did I within a gap of just few weeks. We both fully invested ourselves in taking care of our daughters; even though we both knew our love was only growing deeper by the day.

I was going through postpartum depression and he was the only one who could make it better for me. I tried to stay away from him but I just couldn’t. I loved everything about him; his smile, his voice, his gestures, his sense of humour, his anger, his possessiveness, his care, his love, his passion, his warmth, everything.

And then one day he just looked at me and said it all! He said, he loves me and wants me for life. He was ready to give up everything to be with me and said he will wait for me and will respect my decision no matter what.

We are both sort of happily married but yet long for each other, hope to be with each other and want each other for life. I often wonder if this love is worth risking it all; our current marriages, our kids’ future and everything else.

He is away for two months with his family now and we have never missed each other more. We realize everyday how deep our love really is and suddenly it feels worth it! Worth risking everything for!

It’s frustrating we can’t meet and see each other while he is so far away. If it was just a fling or an affair we would have let go by now but this is true love, we just know it! It’s the kind of love that you would die for! I have never been so close to anyone in life.

We have decided to take a call after he is back and no matter what we decide, we will remain friends for life. Not sure what fate has in store for us, but if we decide to go ahead and get married, I really hope our spouses find their true love too.

Choosing between my fairly good marriage that involves a kid and true love will not be easy, but that's life I guess. 

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