How It Really Feels When Your Ex Lover Gets Married Right After Your Break Up

Sunandita Sunandita in Life Is Tough on 7 March, 2017

I was 25 then. Having a fulfilled life, with greatly supportive parents, wonderful siblings and a loving boyfriend who never hesitated to support me. If I was asked at that point about my most valuable possession, I would have said it's him. 

I was nourishing the relationship with all my heart and soul. More than loving him, I admired him. It was a long distance relationship. So phone was the only medium to connect. Late night talks with him was a part of my daily routine. I used to wait for his call every morning too. He used to call everyday after reaching office, to let me know he reached safely. Those were his small ways of expressing his love and I was thoroughly enjoying it.

I was living those golden days, unaware of the fact that life can be a bi*** sometimes. One fine day, I stopped getting calls from him.
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I had an argument with him the previous night, about him discussing our relationship at home, with his family. Though in my heart I was dying to hear his voice that morning, I didn't call him. Rather waited for his call, which never came ! I mailed him asking for the reason. And the reply I got from him gave me the biggest shock for years. Yes, he had left me and was gone forever. This is what I got after giving 2.5 years of selfless love to my partner.

He left without even letting me know, he had left me forever. The reason being, his family would not have agreed for this relationship, as we didn't "look" compatible together. I have dusky skin and he was fair. I used to be bulky and he was thin. 

I somehow was expecting that he will come back. Because I believed, look never mattered to him. But he didn't. I begged, I cried, I prayed. But all in vain. Breaking up with the person whom you gave your heart, soul and mind to is more painful than death. You need to survive the aftermath.

I left the city and moved to a new city to deal with life. That was another struggle in itself. New place, new people and no job. And the breakup experience was haunting me every moment. I decided to keep myself busy all the time. It was like I was dealing with a kid within myself. I had to console myself when I was crying. I started talking to myself more than I spoke with other people. I finally managed to get a job.

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Gradually life started smiling at me again but I was struggling hard to come out of the pain. I had no idea what he was up to. So one day, I decided to check his profile on social media.

I could not believe what I found on his profile. He was married. I could not breathe for a minute. It choked every part of my body. It had not even been a year since our breakup and he had moved on with someone else. I was back to where I had started.

This time it was more difficult to deal with myself because there was no hope left. I started having trust issues with everyone. I struggled to even make new friends. The feeling of betrayal always haunts me. The only thing where I was putting all my energy into was my work. Because there was no fear of losing there.

I used to think — may be it is the best thing that has happened to me, I can’t say right now but may be some years down the line, I would realise. This was the mantra that made me survive through those difficult years. And of course yoga that played a vital role in bringing balance, focus and calmness in my life.

After 6 years to the traumatic breakup, I can say, I am happily single today. Life is worth living again.

Though I claim to have healed completely, it has taken a part of my soul. I keep that part of my life untouched because I know if I tamper with it, I will end up suffering again. I can never forgive him. But I have made peace with it now. Even if he broke me, I still wish the best for him.