I need you to know a few so-called important things about me. I am not what it seems from the outside. I am not a shy, dreamy, immature woman. I had been in a serious kind of relationship for over six years. I loved him. I slept with him. Yes I am not a virgin.
Do you wish to read further? In case you do, I'll continue telling you things. I am under treatment for severe depression and I don’t think I am recovering. Do you want to know more about me?
Well, you know I tell people I graduated from so and so college. Wrong. I studied in college but never graduated. I failed in my final exams. Dear, do you have a little hope to find this letter in humour?
Don’t. These are the harsh truths I am living with. In an Indian Muslim society I am perhaps the worst twenty five year old single woman.
I could have confessed these things later on or could not have said a word at all. I had the right to do so.
But I chose to tell you everything because I know who I am. I respect myself and my values. I would have died to keep these secrets from you since they make me, me. Whether I am good or bad is not my problem. I love myself.
I don’t let anyone get through to me. Inside this hard shell is a woman who is the real me. I am afraid of love and marriage. Yet I long for your love. I too have desires and dreams of a loving husband and a peaceful happy life.
I dream of giving my husband everything he needs to be happy. And except my husband I can think of none other than you. I love you.
Do you have enough strength to support me? Do you have the will in your heart to accept my love? I apologize for this isn’t a romantic letter. It’s about the truth you will be facing if you accept me in your life.
I wanted you to know these before you decide to accept my proposal. One more thing, no not another bomb, whether you accept my proposal or not we will continue be good friends.
Thanks for hearing me out.
Yours truly Xx