My Husband Has An Extra Marital Affair But My Parents Have Left Me With Only One Option

Anonymous Anonymous in Culture Shock on 29 April, 2017

I was completely against the idea of an arranged marriage, but my parents forced me to get engaged to a guy just because he earned two lac rupees per month. He came with his family to meet me one Friday afternoon, after college. I told my mom that I wanted to talk to him alone, but he came along with his mother, so I didn’t get a chance to talk to him about anything. His parents wanted us to get engaged as soon as possible and so after five days, I was engaged to him.

In fact, it was on our engagement day when we first talked to each other. He didn’t say much and acted as though he wasn’t really interested in me. I remember telling him, even then, that I didn’t want to get married so soon and requested him to ask his parents to fix the date after a year. I was only twenty years old back then. 

After our engagement, he started calling me every night. Initially, he was nice to me, but soon he revealed that he was getting married only for sex. He said that after marriage, I would be his property and he would be free to have sex with me, as and when he wanted. He even mailed me a PDF copy of Kamasutra and asked me to study all sex positions, he even explained in it.

I was shocked to hear all this, but when I told my mother about it, she thought he was just fooling around and asked me not to take it seriously. And so, I didn’t.

After marriage though, I came to know that he was a sex addict. He would force me to have sex with him every time he could manage - in the morning, at noon, in the evening and at night. He wasn’t interested in talking to me, or getting to know me. All he wanted from me was sex.

Just like any other girl, I too wanted a caring husband, but all my dreams were shattered. And yet, I adjusted to it all and gave in to his demands, thinking that maybe that’s how married life is supposed to be.

Sometime later, when I was in my final year of engineering and he was working abroad, his parents started interfering between us. They started calling my husband and lying to him. They told him things that I hadn’t even done. My mother-in-law said nasty things about my mother and began interfering in my personal matters too. Then one day, my husband told me that he would divorce me if his parents asked him to do so.

To make matters worse, his mother called my family names and told me that since they married their son to me without taking any dowry, I should stay with them the way they asked me to. Six months after this incident I came to know that my husband had an extra marital affair in Dubai.

When I asked him about it, he said he had enough money to be with the top European models and he didn’t need to give any explanations about it, to me. He even said that I had no place in his heart.

As if to support their son in his misconduct further, his parents called me to say that I wasn’t good enough for their family and the only reason why their son went to other women, was because he was unhappy with me. They didn’t know that their son was a helpless drunkard and chain smoker, and unsurprisingly, when I told them about it, they put the blame for that too on me. 

But I became completely helpless when my own parents refused to support me. When I couldn’t take my in-laws’ nonsense any longer, I told my parents about the way my in-laws and my husband treated me. My parents’ response startled me.

They said my divorce would taint their family name and ruin my sisters’ chance at marriage. They suggested I go to Dubai, instead and stay with my husband, in whichever condition he kept me. They said they couldn’t keep me with them.
Author's Note:

I have no place to go now. What was my fault in all this?

Editor's Note:

A failed marriage is not a taint on a woman’s character, nor does it reflect her upbringing. Share this story to empower women suffering the same fate everywhere. Share this story to let them know that they are not at fault. They deserve another chance at happiness and love.