My Daughter Is Your Son's Widow: Are You Sure You Really Want To Treat Her Like This?

Anonymous Anonymous in Culture Shock on 19 March, 2018

To my daughter’s in-laws,

I am a parent of the 26-year-old widow girl your son has left behind. As you know, my daughter has already experienced the biggest tragedy of her life already, by losing her love in such a tender age. We as parents should provide her with all the strength and love that she needs. We should help her set her life again by helping her overcome the impact of this pain. Everyday I see her crying, hiding her face in her pillow, making sure no one sees. She suppresses her simple desires like getting dressed, going out, etc. She has cut herself off from the whole world. Is it her fault that her husband passed away?

Come on, she is just 26. Why are you being in-laws, still acting like typical in-laws? After losing your son, you should become her parents because she was his better half. She is a part of your son, a part that is still alive, a part he left behind. You should consider her as your own daughter. Why do you want her to stay with you all her life and take care of you? You have each other and your other son is easily capable of taking care of you. Then why do you want to spoil the life of a 26-year-old widow by wanting her to stay with you throughout her life doing nothing?

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You have taken everything from her, all her husband's money, ATM cards, bank account balance, his clothes, wallet, phone, everything. She lost herself in mourning his loss, and instead of consoling her, you are further pushing her into an abyss.

If you are not thinking of her wellbeing at all, then how do you claim to have a right on her? If you really think that you have a right on her, then act like real and genuine parents do. Make her future secure financially.

Help her to do something worthy in life and find her purpose again. Let her take up a good career so that she doesn’t have to beg or depend on us for money.

Make her go out with her friends so that she sees a world beyond her pain. Don’t make her feel like her life is a curse. If you call her again and again in that environment, and tell her that she should take care of you then how she will come out of her pain? Your life will get back to normal as soon as you will get your second son married. But if you will abuse her, and keep her with you, after taking all her things, not letting her do anything for her financial stability, then how she will survive? Your son was taken by god, but you are killing my daughter by your own hands and cheap mentality. Don’t do this. Do not ask her to die for outliving him, as a consolation for you.

How can parents see their daughter dying daily? I wish god had made you parents of a girl too, then you would have realized the pain of a girl's parent.
Editor's Note:

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