My Christian Family Has Refused To Believe What My Brother Did To Me When I Was 12

Anonymous Anonymous in Culture Shock on 7 February, 2017

I am a girl who belongs to a Christian family. Except my father, everyone else is religious. I became an atheist long time ago and why it happened is the most disgusting experience of my life. When things in my life turned upside down, I lost faith in everything. I lost faith in God, hope, future, people, everyone.

I am 21 years old now and the experience I had when I was just 12 scarred me for life.

I come from a very big family. My Dada (father) grew up with seven brothers and three sisters. My parents were abroad when I was 12 years old and my sister was 8 so they left us with my aunt. She had two daughters who were twins. My other cousin visited us occasionally. He was about 18 years old at that time.

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It all started when he was so willing to pick me up and my sister from school everyday. He used to come in a two-wheeler. My sister sat in front of him and I used to sit on the backseat. While on our way back home, he'd all of a sudden tell me to hold him tight. Then he'd always kept itching his back.

It was much later that I realised he wasn't rubbing his back, he was pressing my breasts.

Then slowly, the touches started going here and there. He started feeling my thighs. I felt confused and bad at the same time. I didn't know what to do or say. I tried talking to my aunt who I lived with.

She said, "Don't say things like that about him. He is a very good brother. He was born on the day of pentecost. Don't say lies."
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I understood one thing that day that no one in the family will ever believe me because he was a role model for everyone. On the outside and in front of everybody, yes, he was a decent man. But little did they know what he did to me emotionally and physically when nobody was looking. I didn't know I was molested. It took a lot of time to realise things and I gauged some courage over the years.

I finally told my Dada about it. What's shocking is even he refused to believe me. It felt so lonely that day and it led me to my depression. Even as I write this, I am convincing myself that one day, my parents will understand what he did to me. Every night I cry myself to sleep.

It's been 9 years since the last time my 'holy brother' touched me badly and I am still not over it.

At this point I actually wish I had amnesia so I could forget everything at once. I hope my Dada believes me some day. No one tells people these kinds of things just for fun.

No one understands that when a child talks about the way a person touched him/her, it comes after a lot of days of building courage. 

This post was submitted by Priyanka Tresa Milton.

Author's Note:

Child abuse should stop. People, please pray that my Dada will understand me one day.

Editor's Note:

Share this story because every child deserves to be heard.