Marriage For Me Meant Not Only Losing My Family But Also Being Lonely In A Big City

Anonymous Anonymous in Culture Shock on 23 April, 2017

I am not only deprived of family, I'm also not allowed to meet my friends.

When I got married, I knew I was going to leave my family and move far away from them. I visit my family once in a year. One thing that came to my notice after a year was that I had to also abandon my friends. There was a void of people with whom I could laugh, talk my heart out and enjoy.

That void that is not even considered by my husband.

Family had changed so I had to even change my friends. When you get married, you are enforced with your husband's friends who are, well, cordial with one another. I am married in a state where I can't even speak their regional language and when they communicate, I feel left out.

I had to join a kitty where ladies blabber utter rubbish and talk nonsense all the time. And one day it was so dismaying, one of my friends came to my city and insisted to meet.

I urged my mother-in-law to let me go and visit her but she blatantly refused stating there was no need to go out when I could call her over instead, to talk. I ended up not meeting her.

Nobody feels that a friend is also an essential part of my life. When I visit my family, I have to dig in time to catch up with my friends. I need someone to talk to and be myself with. After marriage I have not attended a single friend's marriage.


It's been 3 years since I have been married, the only people I know in this city are my in-laws and my husband. However, I do have to incessantly meet my mother-in-law's friends and act sweet with those chubby aunties and pretend as if they are my peer group.

Now in April it's my best friend's wedding and I already know I would be asked not go as I visited my parents' house two months ago. I don't know how to make them understand that I know her since I was 7 and she has all the rights to have me by her side at this point. I am left lonely in this bustling city because I chose to get married.
Editor's Note:

Marriage for a woman should not mean choking her social life. Please share this story if this makes you angry as well.