I Only Wanted Love But They Always Looked For Dowry

Anonymous Anonymous in Culture Shock on 30 September, 2017

I am Sonia, a small town girl. I never really had pretty high aspirations in my life. But always wanted to be happy. Being from a Punjabi family, I had seen a lot of aggression in my family since childhood. I felt as if I was not getting that love and affection in my family which my friends got. We love each other, but fail to express.

Maybe that's why I was attracted to love. I was so attached to my friends that I almost forgot to concentrate on my family.

Later in my college days, I met a guy and fell in love. But my family disapproved of him because of various reasons like caste and physical appearance. He was someone who truly was the one who can take my all worries and somewhere wanted me to repair my strings back with my family.

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Years passed but my parents kept rejecting him. It was a big NO from their end. Finally, I decided to move on as I wanted to respect my parents' decision. Leaving my years of this fantastic relationship behind, my parents got me registered on various matrimonial sites and I started getting proposals.

One of the profiles seemed to impress me. Our families shared our numbers and we started talking and chatting with each other. We started liking each other and then our families met. Probably when we met he didn't seem to be the same guy whom I saw in the pictures, as in a lot of editing was done. But the matter of the fact that I liked him as a person and not how he looked. My parents were not that keen on getting me married to this guy but I insisted that I wanted to get married to him.

We were actually not from a well to do family so my parents clearly said it will be a simple marriage affair which my in-laws agreed upon. But soon before few months of marriage, they started demanding. And I being a fool always pressurised my parents to fulfil their demands. My marriage was nothing like the normal marriage. My parents were unhappy, my in-laws were angry and there was a sense of negativity in the entire marriage. Still, I kept on moving and soon after the marriage; my in-laws started criticizing my parents.

I was not allowed to visit my home. When I was finally allowed to meet my family, I was asked to get dowry. They never made me a part of any of their conversations. I used to feel left out.

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I was shattered and soon regretted my decision. I wanted to leave everything and go back to my family. My parents were in debts and I couldn't ask them for dowry.

On the other hand, my husband never stood by my side. He had many affairs going on. It didn't make a difference to him even after I left my very short-lived marriage.

Today I'm an independent woman, fighting cases of domestic violence, dowry, and divorce. He hadn't signed the divorce papers since three years. But the story doesn't end here. After so many years of struggling with my cases and jobs and by being almost negative about relationships and marriage I found a guy who truly loves me. After working together in the same organization, we got to know each other. We confessed our love for each other. We meet every day and can't live without each other. I want to get married to him. He respects and loves me. I want to be blessed by his parents willingly. I pray day and night.  I wish to get separated from my ex-husband as soon as possible.

I'm looking forward to marrying the love of my life.

Editor's Note:

Share this story, if you know someone who is stuck in an unhappy marriage. What would you suggest?