Dear Stressed Sexy Woman: Thigh Gap Is NOT Beautiful

Anonymous Anonymous in Fashion Ki Dukaan on 7 February, 2017

Thigh gap! So some time ago, and just like that, this bodily phenomenon made it's debut on the headlines of several media platforms under the category of "Beauty".

And just like that, like an unplanned baby, a new benchmark for 'beauty' was born. What was that? The thigh gap.

Curious and intrigued when I first saw the caption and the accompanying image of a young, successful actress with an oval hole between her skinny legs, I was forced to read further. The irony of it all is that even though this person in particular is a powerhouse of talent, I will now forever associate her with this visual image in my head. She will always remain the girl with a sexy (not sure if that's appropriate) 'thigh gap' to me. Because, you know, a national award or box office success aren't that hard to achieve. 

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If the magazines are to be believed, to be naturally endowed with a gap between your anorexic legs is a far, far greater achievement.

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In fact didn't one tabloid very subtly hint at women world over surgically carving their legs to achieve the same?!

So naturally, my next move was to rush to the mirror to see if by some act of miracle I do find this equivalent of the Halley's comet in my galaxy. Needless to say I didn't! My legs, which I must add are the least problematic area of my anatomy, didn't live up to this prerequisite of being a modern day Cleopatra. Alas, they were mere human legs, not flesh covered pogo sticks! So, now what? 

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If I were a teenage girl, I'd imagine this might have been at least a dent if not a massive blow to my self-confidence.

But today I wonder even if I did have this much coveted thigh gap, would more men have actually found me attractive? Would I be richer, would I be wiser, what would my future be like?

Que sera sera! I sing as if on auto-pilot, immediately thinking of my mother. I wonder what she would say if I asked her? Would she kill me? No. She'll probably give me the same profound advice she's been giving me for years — "I think you're going crazy, maybe you're feeling weak.... eat something!"

The funny part is, more often than not she's been right. Things always seem better after you've eaten well.

Thankfully this time, common sense prevails  and I realise that the framework of my skeletal system cannot be changed in this lifetime. So it's back to my research on the more achievable (ya right) rock hard abs. After all, what good is a gap in your thighs if the area above is jelly? Sigh! Living upto the media's perception of the perfect body is hard work.

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Even if I did somehow miraculously manage to acquire the dream body, what would they tell me next? It isn't perfect until the diameter of your earlobes aren't exactly 0.1732569 inches?

And the worst part is most men don't even read these magazines that set us women up for failure. So while, on a night out, he's just trying to get a drink at the bar, we're busy trying to perfectly align our legs so the thigh gap is on full display in our short dresses. But before you think this is a dismal scenario let me tell you it isn't. Not at all. Because you know who does read these magazines? Other women. And make no mistake, women dress up only for other women. There, it's out in the open!

Dear men, hope you're listening. While you spray on that expensive cologne that promised to have women buzzing around you like bees and you flex those muscles that you spent hours in the gym earning, what we are really thinking is, I hope SHE doesn't think I look fat.

Don't get us wrong. It isn't a sexual thing at all. More like when your teacher would bury her head into your maths book scouting for mistakes, and you're waiting on the other side studying her face for any change of expression. It's that same feeling. We work out and dress up in the hope of making every girl in the room pass us on the 'hotness test'. And thanks to magazines like these, inventing new rules with every issue, our exams keep getting tougher.

Two girls telling us "you've lost weight" is so much more satisfying than five men saying "you look hot". Your job is simply to smell good and get your 'funny' on to help us unwind amidst all this pressure.

And in the middle of the night when you catch your partner glued to her phone, which she promptly hides when she realizes she's being watched, don't immediately suspect she's whatsapping a secret lover. She's probably just surfing the Internet for butt-firming and arm-toning exercises. In fact a considerable amount of our Internet plan each month is spent doing just that. And each day we pray that, as we click on that big bold red link that promises 'celebs diet secret revealed', it's going to unleash the well concealed fact that eating chocolate every day is the only way to acquire their super hot bods.

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Because how can something so good actually be bad for us? It really makes you question your belief in God sometimes.

So until the day scientists are able to prove that God really does love his children and we've simply been following his instructions wrong (fruits in moderation and chocolate should be 75 per cent of your daily diet). Until that day, it's back to quinoa, the new superfood for me or wait is that already outdated? My apologies. At the time of writing this I was drinking 2 spoons of coconut oil daily for a flat belly.

By the time you're reading this it'll undoubtedly be something new altogether.

P.S: Hope psychiatrists are keeping track of these changing trends because in a decade or so they're going to need all this information to treat the root cause of a majority of mental breakdowns.

Diagnosis: Schizophrenia caused by an unhealthy overdose of reading articles on 'the perfect body'.

Symptoms: Patient now sees life size vegetables chasing her down a street forcing her to eat them.

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Treatment: A slab of chocolate riding a white horse to come rescue her from the vegetables daily.

This post was submitted by Nitya Satyani.

Author's Note:

I am a carb-loving, chocolate-obsessed foodie sandwiched in a fitness driven world that has set unreal standards of cosmetic perfection.

Please Note: Comfort food doesn't judge.

Editor's Note:

Please share this story because there are enough reasons to stress about in this big bad world, thigh gap does not hold a place there. What's your idea of beauty? That's all that matters!