I'm writing this piece today because I have no friend to “confide” into. I have been selectively extrovert always. I have never been close to many people. However, I had a few friends. And among them, I have always been closest to one friend, Astha.

We were together in the same college and then same office. We have known each other for the last 7 years.

We have seen many phases of our life together. When you know someone for so many years, it's kind of like you've grown together. We have faced exams, placements, results, office routine, office parties, promotions and many more things together. I always considered her my best friend. But, I was never even a friend to her, I guess. There have been many instances in my life when I needed her the most, as I was never comfortable talking and opening up my heart to anybody else in this entire world, not even my family. And she knows it quite well.

And all this time, she was never there for me.

I always used to forgive her, because we have spent so much time together and sometimes after a while, you tend to forgive people in order to keep them in your life. That's what I've been doing till now. These days, I've not been in my usual mood. I'm going through a rough phase in my life. The least I expected from her was for her to be there by my side. I just wanted her to at least once listen to my problems.

But, she avoided it all the time, making excuses that do not even make sense.

She has been giving me excuses of being busy with office and personal life. But, she attends office parties, reaches home late. But doesn't have time to talk to me because she is apparently busy. I'm visiting a psychologist these days because I had to get few things out of me and no one is there with me right now. My so-called friend has ended our 7 years of friendship saying that “she is busy and I should confide in somebody else”. Anyway, it will take me some time to accept these changes in my life. But, I'm learning to manage on my own. I just want to send a message to everyone out there that if you are friends with somebody, at least make sure you are there for them when they need you the most.

Friendship is not about just hehe haha.

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