mother-in-law unhappy marriage husband and wife domestic abuse

They Told Me To Forget My Parents And Live According To The Rules Of Their House

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

 

I am unsure where to begin. It has been 3 years since I got married to him and things haven’t turned out as expected.

I am a working mother living in Bengaluru. I got married in 2014 and things became bad from the second day of our marriage itself.

My in-laws told me to forget my parents and live according to the rules of their house.

I thought this was pretty common in every house and I tried to adapt to their rules. But all they had was an ego that they are superior to everyone. It was killing me inside.

My mother-in-law was the culprit behind all my problems.

If I missed giving her a call on a busy day at work, she would silently make a mess of things by telling everyone, “I don’t know why she is not talking to me.” Still, I kept ignoring everything and tried treating her like my mother.

Whenever there was any function at my mother's place, my in-laws would also plan some event on the very same day. I would get busy with their event and miss the function at my mother’s house.

Initially, I thought this was a simple coincidence but never understood that it was planned.

I did everything a daughter-in-law should do but at the end of the day, if something went wrong or my husband got angry over an issue, I was blamed for it.

Then, I was blessed with a baby boy. I was very happy to become a mother. Just as I was trying to adjust to all the new changes, it was time for my baby’s naming ceremony. But my in-laws created a mess of that as well.

I was scared to perform any event as I would either end up crying or my parents would be unhappy.

But I decided that it was time to stand up for myself. It was my baby and anything related to him had to be done in a correct manner. I started telling my in-laws how I wanted things to happen.

I would directly put my thoughts in front of my father-in-law and my mother-in-law could not do anything to spoil it.

However, I think I am losing myself in leading such a life where my husband listens only to his parents and keeps blaming me. I thought he understood how I felt but it was just momentary.

Whenever my mother-in-law tells him something, he immediately sides with her and I am left all alone.

I really don’t know how to set things right. I want to lead a happy life but I am in a phase where my husband doesn’t even want to see my face. I am unable to decide whether leaving him would solve the issue, as a lot of family discussions have been in vain.

No matter how strong I try to be, things are not going as expected.

I am losing faith and hope in life.

 

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