Relationships insecurities Love

I'm Not As Perfect As Our Relationship And I'm Afraid I'll Lose Him

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

I had been dating this guy for over 10 months when I met someone at my new workplace. This man was two years younger to me. He seemed really handsome but I did not want to have anything with him.

I was dating this man who fitted the bill in all criteria but all these 10 months, I think both of us knew that I was not in love with him. It was all about casual meetings, dinners, going out and that's all.

While working on an office project, I started interacting with this guy and we clicked. He had been in a committed relationship of 2 years and everybody knew about it. His girlfriend would regularly call, he would always talk about her, seemed like a perfect relationship to me. Slowly, we started talking, we started looking forward to spending time together during breaks.

He shared deep secrets of his life with me and I felt important. We became good friends, everybody could see that. I was planning to move out of city post one of my exam results and he would say that if you make it, things would get difficult for me. I never understood why. The day my result came, I was shattered since I didn't make it and he was there, with his handkerchief below my lashes, hugging me, consoling me.

During one of those hugs, he said 'I kind of love you and I don't care what anybody says...' that was it. He expressed that day and I that's when it struck me. He was all I needed. He made me happy. He validated all my goodness. With him, I was happy without effort, without care.

It didn't take us much time or thinking to figure out we wanted to be together. He said he was there in his relationship like a routine, whereas with me, he felt alive. I am what makes him want to do better in life. We parted ways with our respective partners.

It’s been two months and everyday with him is bliss. He is working somewhere else now but nothing has changed, probably only got better. We laugh, we share, we care, we love. We know each other so well. Everyday, I want to tell him that I love him more than yesterday. But the thought that why would he leave his all perfect girlfriend for an imperfect person like me makes me feel scared. I think he might leave me soon as well. I love him like I have not loved anybody else. He makes me believe in love, that my fairy tale is happening, like I need nothing else in life. But am I good enough for him? Would I be able to handle if he falls out of love?

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