I'm Married To A Different Person Today But I'll Always Regret Not Taking My Lover To My Parents

Anonymous Anonymous in Your Story on 17 February, 2017

Every step in life is a march from innocence, through temptation, to virtue or vice.

Our relationship started with innocent friendship. Our closeness increased in such a way that one of the mutual friends, who happens to be my close friend, felt jealous as she loved him. We used to speak with him on a daily basis for hours, with the only topic of how she felt jealous, how she reacted to his ignorance and so on. We started meeting often as friends until we realised that we were in love.

The understanding we both had was so strong that we knew nothing could separate us. Without thinking that this relationship could also be an endless friendship, we named it as love and there began the role of committed lovers.

After a year, I had to move to a different city for graduation. We still continued speaking with each other, sharing everyday routine etc. My day used to begin with his call and end with his call. Our relationship was all about happiness, laughter, love, romance. One day, we lost our close friend (who also loved him) expired due to negligence of her health. We both were heartbroken. I was so guilty that I somehow felt I was the reason for her sadness because I had come between their friendship. This is when our relationship started to break. I was very sure that both of us felt the same things but never expressed it.

He said we needed a break from the pain we both were going through. This is when I realised how much I loved him and needed him. May be he felt the same and that's why we couldn't end our relation.

Years passed, our relation grew stronger. We loved and trusted each other a lot. We shared all our happiness, sadness, jealousy but none could break our love. The trust was such that we had made up up our minds; if we never married each other, our love will still be eternal.

Time flew, we finished our graduation. He was struggling to get a job while my parents wanted me to get married (they were not serious about getting me married). I wanted to be independent so I shifted to a different city in search of a job and he left for Delhi for his job. There were many times when we were on the verge of breaking up but we couldn't. We tried a lot to maintain the relationship as friends but we failed each time.

I wasn't brave enough to tell my parents about him as they trusted me blindly. After a lot of thinking about what to do with my future, I chose my parents over him, a decision he respected because he knew that they should be my first priority.

Some people don’t realise what they have until it’s gone, but that does not always mean they are supposed to get it back.

Even though I took my decision, I was unable to get over him. He found his life partner in Delhi and he got married. In fact he asked for my opinion about his girl before moving ahead in his life. Sometimes I feel like why he have to ask me for my opinion and the answer was, "Some feelings never change over time, no matter where/what we are."

Today, I am married to a different person. I still regret what I did with my lover, I should have spoken with my parents about him. 

What if my parents had agreed and I too could have a successful love story? When I hear his name or I ever get a thought of him, this regret in my heart pops up. I guess the understanding that we had can not be replaced by anyone.

There is always that one person in your life who you'll forever have a soft spot for.

If ever ex lovers can become friends, either they never loved each other or they are still in love.