break-up heartbreak jealousy long distance ex boyfriend

If I Can't Have Him, Why Should She?

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

We were colleagues but stayed in different cities. He was in Mumbai while I was in Delhi. We became close because of our PR company and built a personal rapport.

It started with discussing client strategies and moved to exchanging BBM pins and adding each other on Facebook.

Before we knew it, we fell for each other.

It was always a long distance relationship. We knew about the differences - different cities, long distance, different castes, work pressure, societal pressure and more.

We never met but the conversations were enough to keep us going.

If I ever got weak, he would cheer me up with double the strength and it all worked well because of trust and loyalty. But are these things enough to keep a relationship going?

Especially when you’ll haven’t met and no plans seem to work out well?

Things started changing when both of us moved to different offices within our respective cities. He decided to come to Delhi to give me a surprise.

However, it wasn’t the best surprise when in the middle of a crazy work day, you get a call from him asking to meet outside your office. Especially when your day is going extremely bad because of the terrible new boss.

I wasn’t that surprised and didn’t go to meet him as I wasn’t able to accept the fact that we were meeting for the first time

Above all, my boss didn’t let me step out. I wanted to hold on to that moment and pinch myself to realize that it was real. We didn’t meet the first day but we planned an awesome date in CP for the following day. But I couldn’t meet him the next day either when he was leaving.

He went back and informed me that he was moving abroad for higher studies. I had no clue how to react.

We started getting busier, the conversations become lesser and things were pretty strange.

So we decided to call it off. He moved abroad but we stayed in touch, however, it was just an exchange of greetings, unlike before. We tried getting back together but it was difficult to get into a relationship again.

You end up comparing things to what they were and expect them to be the way they were earlier or better.

But we couldn’t work it out and finally gave up, realizing that we should move on now. The guy always told me that he would never be able to move on.

There still wasn’t any regret or hard feelings but the day he called and told me that he was in a relationship with someone else, I don’t know why but my heart skipped a beat. There was no smile or disappointment.

Even after being away for so long, why did it feel like it was way too soon for him to get involved with somebody else?

We don’t love each other anymore but yes; we did share a bond once.

Even after all the mutual breakups, I still wonder why there is still a part of me that doesn’t feel happy knowing about his new relationship.


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