I Was Hurting And Struggling But All Of This Was Actually Giving Her Pleasure

Anonymous Anonymous in Your Story on 24 January, 2018

My last relationship had taught me not to get serious with another girl again.

It had lasted for 3 years at the end of which I realized that she had cheated me. So I chose to remain single for almost two years. I managed to move on with great difficulty and was now looking only for a casual relationship. It was at this time that she entered my life. She was my junior and we knew each other but only by face. We were friends on Facebook but we rarely chatted though we had quite a few mutual interests. She was a good girl and the eldest daughter of one of the wealthiest guys in our city.

One day, I took the initiative to talk to her. She responded well and we ended up talking for hours.
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Soon it became a daily scenario. She had moved to a different city to do her graduation but I was doing it from my hometown. We would talk about everything every day and suddenly we realized that we had so many things to share with each other.

She became so close to me that just by hearing the tone of my voice, she could sense my mood. It was as if I had found someone with whom I could just be myself. I did not have to put on a façade when I was with her. We shared that kind of connection with each other. I thought I was blessed to have someone like her in my life.

She was OK with having just a casual relationship with me. Though we were not in a relationship, we would text ‘I love you’ to each other. Everything was good between us.

She then asked me to meet her. She said that she could not meet me in our city because her family was very strict. So I went to meet her in the city that she lived in. I caught up with her and we had our lunch together. We then saw a movie, roamed around the city, took selfies and in the evening we hugged each other before parting ways.

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I did not even try to get physical with her because I did not want to spoil what we shared. Little did I know that all hell would break loose after this.

After I returned to my hometown, she just stopped texting me. Earlier she would get anxious if I did not talk to her for an hour, but now she had stopped using that number as well.

When I asked her about this on Facebook, she gave me a reason for it. I believed her and waited for things to become normal again. Time passed in this manner and she would reply only when I texted her. She never talked to me like she used to. I thought that maybe she was doing this because she was facing some issues. But I went through each day with great difficulty now.

What had started out as just a casual relationship had become a very serious thing for me. I started worrying about her. I would feel sad when I saw her posts on Facebook. My academics were getting affected. I under-performed in my exams because I was worried sick about her.

One day, she told me the ‘real’ reason for her changed behaviour. I believed that as well. I tried supporting her and helped her calm down. Days changed into weeks and weeks into months. The last call that I got from her had been on the day I had met her 7- 8 months back. When I called and texted her she would tell me how distressed she was.

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My friends soon came to know that something was seriously wrong with me. They supported me and told me to leave her. But I was finding it difficult to let go of her. I wanted them to help me.

They told me that she was fooling me yet I believed her more than anyone else. She had deleted my name from her list of contacts, rarely talked with me and had stopped receiving my calls. She never called back now.

I would check out her posts. Sometimes she posted pictures of the good times that she was having with her friends. And here I was waiting for her to come back thinking that things would be normal between us again. Somehow, I realized that this was never going to happen. So I consulted a psychiatrist. Even the psychiatrist told me to avoid her because she was fooling me and enjoying it too.

I was shocked to hear this but somewhere deep down I realized that this too could happen.

I followed all the suggestions that my psychiatrist gave me and have recovered a lot but I still have many unanswered questions that haunt me.

What kind of a mistake had I committed to get this kind of punishment? Was she really telling me the truth or was the psychiatrist right? How can people become so shallow that they stop considering other people’s feelings?
Editor's Note:

Share this story if you too feel we all should have the decency to discuss our feelings with each other honestly before we choose to opt out of any relationship.