I Shared An ‘On And Off’ Relationship With Her But Then I Met This Great Guy

Anonymous Anonymous in Your Story on 5 October, 2017

I am a girl and I shared a relationship with my ex-girlfriend for seven years. I experienced the best phase of my life during the first few years of our relationship.  

She meant the world to me. I felt she loved me completely and whole heartedly. Her love for me seemed unconditional.

I was a fresher in high school at that time. She was my senior and was preparing for her college life. The place that she lived at was 40 minutes away from where I lived. We both did whatever we could to make our relationship work though it was hard to do so at times.

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The years flew by. I was in my last year of high school when I realized that she had cheated on me. She had met someone else and I was torn to pieces. My heart sank and I was so depressed that I ended up losing quite a lot of weight. I felt as if I was enveloped in some kind of a dark cloud.

I cried and begged her to give me another chance. She took me back. I continued to call it ‘love’ though deep down I knew the truth about our relationship.  I even blamed myself for losing her.

My ex-girlfriend and I now shared a very toxic, on-and-off relationship. I was mentally exhausted because we argued and fought every day. I wasn’t happy. I started feeling very depressed again.

But she was all I had. So I stayed.
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We took a trip to New York with some friends. That was when I met a guy. He wasn’t my type. I was least interested in him from the very beginning. But when I left New York, I realized that I missed him.

I had been in a relationship with my girlfriend since the age of 13. I had dedicated all my teenage years to her.  I didn’t know why I was so interested in this guy. But I decided to contact him as soon as I returned home. I knew what I was doing was wrong. But I wasn’t happy with my girlfriend. My heart was in agony because we shared a very toxic relationship.  

I knew it wasn’t healthy anymore. So I began texting the guy. I wanted to find myself. I wanted to know what I wanted.

I felt so happy and so positive all the time when I started talking to him. For the first time in my life, my co-workers asked me if I was seeing anyone because every time I walked past them, I would smile down at my phone and behave like a person who was feeling giddy.

My ex-girlfriend and I still shared an 'on and off' relationship so I decided that the best thing for us would be to go our separate ways.

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She could not accept my decision so she took my phone and smashed it so that I couldn’t contact the guy. She then smashed all the glass in our apartment.

I knew I had to rush back to my parents’ home before she decided to turn on me because by now she had broken and destroyed everything. That was the last straw. I knew right away that there was no way I was going to get back with her. After a few days, she came around and begged me to return to our apartment. She said she would try and fix what she had broken. But I couldn’t even imagine going back with her now. And going back would mean going back to all the unnecessary fights and arguments.

I simply couldn’t do it. I somehow felt broken from inside. I had been crying inside for too long.

After a while, I decided to meet the guy from New York again. We became very good friends. He was so positive and honest that he managed to change my entire outlook towards life. Even today, I feel that he saved me from feeling miserable about my broken relationship with my ex-girlfriend. For seven years, I thought I wouldn’t be able to lead an independent life or live without my ex-girlfriend.

But he proved to me that I could do so, if I really wanted to. I liked him more and more with each passing day because I was drawn by his honesty.

Unfortunately, our relationship didn’t work out for us because of the distance. But we still always make it a point to keep in touch. He still gives me great advice and is very honest with his answers. This is what I love about him and he has been like this from the very beginning.

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I love him a lot. I know it is one sided but he saved me from myself and showed me what self love is.

I am in my final year of college now and I have never been happier in my life. When I was young, I thought I couldn’t live without my ex-girlfriend. But look at me now. I am still alive and happier than ever.  I am very excited about what the future holds for me. I hope to marry a man like him one day. If you meet a man like this, he is definitely a keeper.

As for my ex-girlfriend, I wish her the best of luck. I hope that someday she realizes that breaking glass does not solve anything. If you are in a toxic relationship, ask yourself if you are happy.

Author's Note:

Self love is a beautiful thing. It took me 22 years to realize this. Now I am all about positivity and helping others love themselves. We all should stay true to ourselves and love ourselves before loving others.

Editor's Note:

We ALL fumble and falter in our lives. If we are willing to learn, we can imbibe several worthwhile life lessons from our mistakes too. Share this brave young girl’s story because, like her, we should never hesitate to take the support of people who care for us. Sometimes we need to learn such simple things too.